The Thing (2011)
John Carpenter’s version is so much better. Much grosser and scarier too!
Category:Film Reviews
Kill Your Friends (2015)
This one really wants to be the UK version of American Psycho so badly that it ends up flailing in desperation.
The Huntsman: Winter’s War (2016)
Thor and Not-Natalie-Portman take on Elsa, who just can’t let it go, while four midgets run around kissing for the Rule 34 crowd.
Snow White and the Huntsman (2012)
Bella Swan and Thor get together to take down the evil Queen and kill us all with boredom.
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)
The best thing about this movie is Wonder Woman’s throwaway appearance. Everything else is just dreary and plodding.
Man of Steel (2013)
I don’t recall Superman being this dreary, joyless, and insufferable. Can we have another reboot?
100 Bloody Acres (2012)
So this is what goes into Australian fertilizer. Tasty.
Death Factory (2014)
Okay, this one is pretty rubbish, but the main guy is so pretty. Decisions, decisions…
Zoolander 2 (2016)
Derek Zoolander is old news, a has-been, despite what the movie tries to tell you.
Gods of Egypt (2016)
Gerard Butler being naked the entire movie may have saved it. Maybe. There are just too many annoyances in here.