Main cast: Nikolai Leon (Christopher Robin), Maria Taylor (Maria), Natasha Rose Mills (Jessica), Amber Doig-Thorne (Alice), Danielle Ronald (Zoe), Natasha Tosini (Lara), Paula Coiz (Mary), May Kelly (Tina), Danielle Scott (Charlene), Craig David Dowsett (Winnie-the-Pooh), and Chris Cordell (Piglet)
Director: Rhys Frake-Waterfield
Now, seizing the opportunity to do horror films out of fairy tales that have gone into public domain is an idea that I can absolutely get behind,so kudos to Rhys Frake-Waterfield for striking the iron while it is hot. However, this movie was shot in just 10 days or so, so… yeah.
Also, the writer, director, producer, and editor was also involved in gems like Croc! (2022) and H.P. Lovecraft’s Monster Portal, so yeah. Okay, maybe not yeah; more like a shiver of fear.
It definitely made a big profit out of people peeking at this out of morbid curiosity, so good for the folks behind Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey. Let’s see if this curiosity carries on to the next two planned movies, because this movie can’t boast of much else when it comes to why anyone should bother with it.
The story here is that, when he was a boy, Christopher Robin stumbled upon what he thought were cute creatures, but were actually “half breeds” or “abominations”: Owl, Rabbit, Eeyore, Piglet, and of course, Winnie-the-Pooh. He fed them and befriended him over the years, until alas, he had to go to college.
Apparently, these creatures hadn’t learned to find food for themselves, because that first winter without Christopher bringing them food, they were so hungry that they ended up eating Eeyore. This act fractured their minds, and they became feral beasts that hate all humans.
So, we cut to five years later, when Christopher has this bright idea to bring his wife Mary to Hundred Acre Woods to introduce them to his friends, to prove to her that his childhood friends are real. Mary has her doubts, and she tries instead to have Christopher accept that his friends were imaginary.
Well, she will soon learn the hard way that Pooh and Piglet are real when they happily murder her in front of a shrieking Christopher.
Weirdly, after all this set up, the credits roll and the movie shifts to the two dudes in animal masks instead butchering their way through some forgettable ladies that are here just to do topless scenes and get murdered. Yes, those ladies decide to get together at Hundred Acre Woods and basically handing themselves to those two on a giant platter.
Now, the budget for this baby was $100,000, actually a pretty decent amount. To compare, Terrifier was made on about a quarter of that budget, but even taking inflation into account, this movie looks far cheaper than the other movie. I suppose it all boiled down to how the budget was maximized, I guess, because while this one boasts some decent gore, there is still a pretty wooden and lifeless quality to each scene.
Often, the lighting is too bright, and there isn’t enough contrast or shadows to create a frightening atmosphere. The camera shots are also static for the most part, which further adds to the whole “film student’s project” feel of the whole thing.
The biggest blunder made by Mr Frake-Waterfield, and yes, he’s the one to blame since he wrote the script, is to focus on some random women that nobody cares about after spending a bulk of the early parts of the movie to get people to invest a little in the story of Christopher and his friends. Christopher is barely in this one, which is a shame as the movie could have been something more than amateur hour slasher snoozer had it did more with him, Piglet, and Pooh.
Instead, it wants to be a standard slasher film, but even as one, it still doesn’t measure up. There is some potential to a Winnie-the-Pooh horror film, but this one is just squandered opportunity.
