Samhain Publishing, $2.50, ISBN 978-1-60504-254-1
Paranormal Romance, 2008
Reading (and buying) a very short story is pretty much a gamble. Very few authors are capable of executing the tight pacing and strict word economizing that are essential for a short story to work. Uncovering Egypt is pretty well-paced for its length, but it’s far from memorable.
Jasmine Devi is an archeologist who loves all kinds of old relic, big or small, associated with Egypt. She often wishes that she can go back in time to experience the days of the Pharaoh first hand. She gets her wish when she impulsively puts on a bracelet that she finds during a dig and finds herself transported back to 2130 BC. Probably 2130 BC Egypt in an alternate universe, since those people back there can communicate well with Jasmine and they even understand what “Fuck you!” means. Then again, everyone in 2130 BC speaks as if they are auditioning for a sitcom in present day America, so I don’t blame Jasmine for being slow in catching on that she has been sent back in time.
King Okpara realizes that Jasmine is his destined new queen because she is wearing that bracelet. Well, he’s lucky, isn’t he, that it isn’t some snaggle-toothed grandmother that shows up in his court wearing it? Destiny is always kind to beautiful people in romance stories, I tell you. Okpara is a romantic too.
Inside the body chamber she looked like an angel waiting to be rescued with a stroke of his cock.
I don’t know what the purpose of this story is, to be honest. The language used is very contemporary, so as an authentic historical romance, this one fails from the get go. The author has wasted a lot of words in detailing Jasmine’s background and her relationship with an asshole colleague, none of them bearing any relevance to the story line, so the romance feels really underdeveloped as a result. As for it being a naughty read, there is only one sex scene here and it’s short – it does not exactly fog up the reading glasses.
It may be a painless read, but Uncovering Egypt is a story that is neither here nor there when it comes to doing anything for me.