Main cast: Craig Ferguson (Mason) and Dan Stevens (Nigel)
Director: Carlos Stevens

In Mason’s Rats, farmer Mason discovers that the rats in his barns have started to use weaponry and even wear clothes. That won’t do, so he buys the latest vermin-busting technologies from TrapTech to eliminate them.

Things get heated until he gets a vicious robot that butchers the rats with cold-blooded efficiency. That’s what the fun goes from heated to RATPOCALYPSE, muahahaha.

Sure, this episode has a message about how animals are our friends, at least when they start displaying human traits. I suppose as long as they don’t… we can destroy them? Or maybe we should destroy them in a humane manner?

Whatever the message may be, I confess that the best parts of this one are when the rats get butchered, torn apart, gored, dismembered, excoriated… oh, it was all so beautiful, I tell you, and I bet I’m not the only one loving the carnage.

The whole love everyone and everything seems tacked on just to placate people that may get offended by the kills in this episode, but those people can politely choke on their soy latte if you ask me.

I’m saying this as a person that allows three spiders to set up camp in my bathroom, mind you. Why not? They are cute, and they help devour all those pesky little bugs and mites that would otherwise be a bother I have to deal with myself. I even saw one of them devour that boyfriend she had just shagged, and it was quite adorable.

Yes, yes, animals are our friends, whatever. Stay for the killings, celebrate the killings.