Main cast: Ali Faulkner (Sissy), Johnny Walter (Bossboy), Derek Lee Nixon (Benny), Tory Tompkins (Barbie), Gregory Kelly (Amphead), Phillip Wolf (Mikey), Matt Hensarling (Kenny), Matt Beene (Cliff), Jon Clinkenbeard (John), Adrian Turner (Ollie), Mike Davis (Newboy), Bo Reed (Mario), Tony Wolford (Ton), Matt Pfohl (Perry), Tom Byrne (Doc), Justin Meeks (Caesar), Jack Lee (Buddy), and Sonny Carl Davis (Carl Wayne)
Directors: Duane Graves and Justin Meeks
Butcher Boys, or Boneboys as it is called in some places, has one singular noteworthy claim to fame: the screenplay is written by Kim Henkel of those The Texas Chain Saw Massacre films.
Okay, most of the sequels, reboots, and spin-offs of that franchise range from pretty meh to absolutely dire, but still, I should point out the pedigree attached to this thing or some people would scoff and send patronizing notes my way.
The presence of Mr Henkel also means that this movie would be very familiar to folks that have watched the original 1974 slasher classic, as there are scenes in this thing that would appear to be replicated from the other film only with new cosmetic window dressing. The folks behind this thing sneakily justify this by saying that this particular film in a parody of the movie and its never-ending sequels and what not.
Sissy, who is the only halfway likable one among the main characters and hence may as well as “Final Girl!!!” stamped on her forehead, probably wonders what she is doing as she spends the evening with her brother Mikey, his best friend Benny, and the friend’s over the top mean and clearly unhinged girlfriend Barbie. Yes, Barbie.
The evening has nowhere to go but downhill, as Barbie puts them all on the hate list of a bunch of men that, unknown to them, rule the city. When they end up running over these men’s dog, they will learn that these men don’t just have the cops and locals scared to even look them. They are also fans of Jonathan Swift, especially as they take his quote about children to heart without understanding that the fellow is being satirical.
Yes, these guys are cannibals, and guess which annoying brats are now on their dinner menu.
This movie is basically a long chase scene featuring poor Sissy as the other three are quickly and unceremoniously dispatched, a good thing as they are all over the top irritating and it can’t be good for the blood pressure to have them around any longer.
It’s hard to pinpoint what these cannibals are as they are an organized band of flesh eaters in one scene, a disorganized bunch of thugs prone in infighting the next, with a very familiar eccentric “family” complete with a masked brutish dim-witted giant forcefully shoved in for good measure. The bad guys are like three different factions mashed together without any effort at coherence.
Then again, the satirical elements are all over the place too. It pokes fun at everything from slasher tropes to annoying vegans, but it never actually delivers any good punchlines. It just goes through the motions of being some kind of homage, parody, satire, or whatever, and there are many moments when claiming to be such is just a way to justify how scatter-brained the whole movie appears to be. The “Oh, it’s bad… but it’s deliberate! Honest!” alibi, if you will.
It doesn’t help that the bad guys do dumb things at convenient moments to let Sissy get out of a jam so often that our darling’s many lucky victories feel unearned.
Still, there are a few nice scenes of gore and twisted violence—a few, not many—and the production values look far better than they should be for a film of modest budget. That’s not really much, but hey, it’s Chinese New Year, and I suppose I should try to be a little nice today.
