Samhain Publishing, $2.50, ISBN 1-59998-857-7
Contemporary Erotica, 2008
Boomerang Love is, of course, set in Australia, the land where guys call a woman “sheila”. If you are the type to wince when you see phrases like “spunky sheila”, you want want to stick a photo of Hugh Jackman to a corner of your PC monitor and imagine that he’s the one calling you that in order to ease the pain. Not that I did that while reading this book, of course.
Cohen Thorn, a local rancher in the Sydney Outback, and Hayleigh Davenport, a Yank tourist, had one night of torrid rooting a year ago. At the start of the story, a year has passed and Cohen is now waiting and hoping that Hayleigh will show up again for more.
I don’t know whether to laugh or not. More power to their tussling, I guess.
“Good. Me, too.” She pulled some hair from across her face. “In fact, I took care of the protection this time.”
His prick twitched. “You sure?” Never had he trusted a woman to take care of business before.
Wait a minute. His prick can speak?
Anyway, let’s continue:
“Yes. I started taking birth control a couple months ago.” She swiped her hair back over a shoulder. “I’m ready to make more memories… maybe even some better than last year’s.” Next she unsnapped her jeans. “I want to feel you come inside me.”
His balls tightened. For the first time in his life, he wanted to lose control inside someone. He’d not deny Hayleigh her request of his load.
I believe “He’d not deny Hayleigh her request of his load.” is going to be my favorite sentence ever in a long time to come.
“Luv, you ever had your arse fucked?”
Wait, I think that is my favorite sentence ever. Can you imagine some guy saying that in an Australian accent?
Oh, and me being daft at times, I once or twice misread “Cohen” as “Colon” in those scenes of rear end buggery, which has me laughing out loud. At myself, of course.
I even find Hayleigh’s announcement that she’s giving up her life in the big city to be a rancher’s wife, complete with plans to home-school the children (or “ankle-biters”, as Cohen puts it), just too funny.
I wish I can say that this story is so erotic that it singes the hair on my head, but I’m afraid I find this more entertaining as a laugh-a-minute read. Not that the characters are silly, of course. In fact, I actually find Cohen and Hayleigh endearing as they are so earnest at times about performing the bum rush thing for the first time. There is something rather sweet and touching about how she has prepared so meticulously for a vigorous reunion make-up-for-lost-time bareback everywhere-sex with some guy she met a year ago. Do kids nowadays ever get this romantic about vacation-time shags during Spring Break? Who knows, the whole situation is ridiculous enough to be real.
I really have a great time with Boomerang Love. Sure, I’ve mocked it, but I do it out of love.
“Luv, you ever had your arse fucked?”
Bwahahahaha.
