Jive
Pop, 2000

Imagine Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Terminator character, Xena, and the whole Buffy gang in a Roman coliseum, waiting for the great evil to rush out from a dark, smelly pit to do battle with them. The grate opens… and out comes Aaron Carter with a microphone.

I tell you, those superheroes would flee as fast as they could, screaming in panic.

Aaron Carter’s horrendous Aaron’s Party (Come Get It) is a prime example of disgusting, legalized child exploitation. Solely on the virtue of his family name, this shrill, obnoxious pipsqueak is let loose to terrorize airwaves, worse, my airwaves. It’s an all-time low.

If you ask me, Girl, You Shine, Internet Girl, and other skin-crawling tunes only drive home that kids in music should either be in a choir or stay in Barney soundtrack hell. Prepubescent love has never been exploited this ugly, in fact, preteen kids are never this terrifying since they invented the Chuckie doll.

Hopefully someone would get some common sense and drag this horror back to school where he belongs.