Main cast: Jennifer Dale (Laura Perry), Andrew Gillies (Warren), Nadia Capone (Mandy), Kaya McGregor (Karen), and Page Fletcher (The Hitchhiker)
Director: Leon Marr

I have a bright idea: I review two episodes a day, and I’d be rid of this show in a week! Assuming that I don’t choke on my vomit first, that is.

Fortunately, A Function of Control is a rare solid episode in this series, which makes my resolution appears less like a suicidal tendency.

By the way, this is Andrew Gillies’s second appearance on The Hitchhiker. Sure, I can wonder aloud why, but I think it’s pretty obvious that the reason must have to do with a desperate need for money or to make sure that some photos or videos remain unseen by the general populace.

He plays Warren, a big boss whose underling Laura Perry is so infatuated with him that she’d sneak into his office while he’s on vacation, and try on his suit and tie while pretending that they are having a tryst in that office.

Naturally, Laura also treats everyone working under her, like her secretary Karen, like crap. She is also the type that claims she’s perfectly content with being a successful career woman when deep down she’s a mass of psychosis waiting to break loose. In short, the unfortunate caricature of a single successful career woman.

When Warren comes back from vacation, apparently estranged from his wife Helen, and says things that convince Laura that he’s finally going to be hers, our darling can’t be any happier. That is, until she realizes that she’s not on his menu, and she decides to eliminate the competition herself.

Laura is an amazing Lifetime movie villain, and she’s played to perfection by Jennifer Dale. Beneath that icy, haughty, and dismissive exterior is a cray cray gone wild, and Ms Dale has everything from her character’s facial expression, voice, and mannerism down pat.

The saddest thing here is that she’s pining for a jerk that only sees her as a useful, efficient robot-like staff, and he’s very aware of her not-so-subtle infatuation with her. He even makes fun of her for this behind her back, as do the other people that notice it too. The latter group have the right to do it, though, considering how horrible Laura is to them, heh.

This episode works because it is simple, straightforward, and unsullied by dumb twists or stupid revelations. The episode obviously has a shoestring budget, but it works well within its constraints to present something that doesn’t reek of badly done cheap CGI.

It especially works because Jennifer Dale really elevates Laura into this magnificent villain that is far less smart than she thinks she is.

So yes, when this show goes out for good by the end of this season, I suppose this season can at least claim to have a good thing in this episode!