Main cast: Kiefer Sutherland (Richard Pinzetti) and Joey King (Blake)
Director: Greg Nicotero
Just when I thought I could take a break from Creepshow until the next season appears from the dread mists of the small screen, someone has to alert me that I overlooked two special episodes that were screened last year. No way, no way… I take a peek and give a small sigh because yes, looks like I still need to review two more “special” episodes of this blasted show. Well, here’s A Creepshow Animated Special, because we all know how amazing the quality of the animation on this show is. I’ve seen better motions each morning when I flush the toilet after doing a number two.
The first segment is Survivor Type, which is about Richard Pinzetti getting stranded on a deserted island. There’s a corpse there on the island with him, but Richard will instead hunt seagulls and eat them raw, thank you… until he runs out of birds to eat one day. By then, the corpse has already washed away so oops. This segment sees top notch examples of crap low-budget animation focusing on Richard acting all dotty and gnarly while cutting into flashbacks to show me what a terrible person he is. I suppose this time at the island is some kind of punishment for his sins then, but frankly, like so much of this show, this segment has neither the wit or the intelligence to make this segment entertaining. It’s just the main character doing repetitive things over and over until it reaches a climax that I can see coming the moment the segment begins.
Next is Twittering from the Circus of the Dead, which is about a teen that is bored while on a family road trip until they come across a circus that use zombies to entertain its audience. If there is one thing this show does that is worse than animation and plotting and pacing, it’s presenting a believable teen protagonist. Blake is, like, whatever, so totally cool, hello how do you do fellow kids, doesn’t she, like, so cool and all, woo-hoo. She and her idiot family show no believable emotion when faced with unusual and even deadly situations, and our protagonist is constantly in her like, whatever, snarky mode even when she’s faced with a terrifying life or death situation. Of course, when she thinks she is about to die, naturally she tweets about it instead of using her damned phone to call for help. God bless her for dying and saving the human gene pool from further contamination.
The first segment is repetitive and tedious, while the second one is brain hemorrhage in action and makes the first one look so good in comparison. Can Greg Nicotero just take a seat and delegate the directing and scripting stuff to people that are more capable of doing good horror? He already flogged The Walking Dead way past its welcome, and it looks like he’s doing the same to this show in a quarter of the time it took for him to completely defecate over the other show.
