Main cast: DW Moffett (Logan Andrews), Pamela Gien (Margaret Richardson), Aubrey Morris (Freddy), Janet Hubert (Psyche), and John Kassir (The Crypt Keeper)
Director: Chris Walas
’Til Death is the fourth episode in a row that is more campy comedy than horror, so it’s safe to assume that this is the direction the ship is sailing, so to speak, and adjust expectations accordingly. It is hard to feel cheated or disappointed, though, because however silly this episode is, it is just too much fun.
Logan Andrews is a hustler in some Caribbean island whose greatest ally is the doctor Freddy, who was exiled from England after killing one too many patient while being pickled. When the episode opens, it is pretty clear that the two of them engineered the recent death of a widow whose funds left Logan well positioned to develop a piece of land. Alas, the land is riddled with quicksand that show up unexpectedly to claim the lives of workers, thus slowing any work he has planned while swallowing up his funds in the process. He needs a new mark.
Freddy introduces him to a new lady in town, Margaret Richardson. She is the daughter of a very wealthy man. Perhaps to soften the blow that the lady would soon be emotionally and physically raped by Logan before being turned into a zombie through no fault of her own, she is portrayed as an unapologetic racist who makes even Logan flinch with her views on the “ethnic” natives. She is also on to Logan and refuses to give him any of her time.
Nonetheless, her “four million in the bank” makes her an attractive candidate for his amorous attention, so Logan visits his ex, the voodoo priestess Psyche (hey, it’s the original Aunt Viv!), for a love potion. As you can guess, Psyche isn’t going to help Logan out of the kindness of her heart, and gives Logan the potion, warning him to give Margaret only one drop or there will be repercussions. Naturally, he uses the entire vial. Margaret dies as a result of the overdose, but because the potion forces her to love Logan till death do they part, and Logan is still alive, she cannot die. Hence, Logan is now pursued by an ardent zombie who refuses to accept his rejection… or his pleas for mercy.
This is a terrible episode on paper. DW Moffett is wooden for the most part, Janet Hubert is overacting in every of her scene, the story is predictable, and there are huge logic gaps and bad science. But somehow, these flaws turn out to be the strengths of the episode – everything comes together, bad acting and all, to result in a hilarious tale of camp. Zombie Margaret’s constant stream of puns is terrible, yet laugh out loud funny – Pamela Gien seems like she is having the time of her life voicing those bad puns. And even Mr Moffett puts in some extra effort to bring on the comedy – even as the episode degenerates into a hilariously bad Bugs Bunny chase sequence, he obliges by giving some of the most hilarious “I’m so screwed!” faces and his high-pitched squeals of terror are just too funny.
So yes, watch this for the awful hilarity, and nobody will get hurt. Take it seriously, though, and you can easily be offended by the portrayal of the dark-skinned natives as well as the all-around unapologetic camp and comedy. So adjust your expectations or proceed with caution!