Main cast: Chris Margetis (Stone Manson), Mike Carey (Skull Manson), David B Meadows (Carson Murdock), Randy Couture (Thump Hanson), DB Sweeney (Vic Quickbuck), Jayden Lund (Marvelous), Shannon Victoria Murray (Lucy), Karen Corona (Mina), Jason Coviello (Cage), Luis Bordonada (The Great Chorizo), Jermaine Washington (Hammer), Charlie Shotwell (Hurley), Mindy Robinson (Shirlene), Scott Peat (Harley), Tim Stafford (Rains), Adrian Pasdar (Doctor Dudembru), and Sean Dillingham (Big Wang)
Director: Max Martini

I’m sure there is a missing colon or apostrophe in the title, but hey, if they want to call this movie The Manson Brothers Midnight Zombie Massacre, who I am indeed to disagree.

What do you do when your wrestling career has hit that phase where you’re losing ground to newer, fresher faces? Chris Margetis and Mike Carey decide to write and produce a movie in which they are also the main stars. Who needs the agents of John Cena and The Rock, right? DIY, baby! The effort pays off too, because this movie is actually pretty entertaining.

Brothers Stone and Skull Mason are, coincidentally enough, wrestlers that have lost their share of the 15 minutes to younger faces. They now tour smaller circuits, under the career guidance of the smarmy Vic Quickbuck (well, he is played by DB Sweeney). Still, life is good. They are doing good for themselves, they have found love, and they get by. When this movie opens, their latest show is rudely interrupted by their opponents taking dodgy performance enhancement drugs made in China and end up becoming feral zombie-like creatures. Not only do they chew on the paying audience, how rude, they also infect their chewed-up victims to become feral zombie-things as well.

Now, let’s manage everyone’s expectations first. The zombie thing only kicks into gear at around the 50th minute mark, which is about the midway point of this movie. While there is some pretty decent gore when things become chewy for everyone, this is not going to be a typical zombie gore fest folks may be led into thinking it is after reading the publicity materials. There are two pointlessly long bookend segments before and after the “real” movie that serve no purpose other than to misled people into thinking that they are watching a trailer trash Rob Zombie film and to announce that a sequel is in the works. Also, the plot is barely half baked, as the main characters are given flimsy plot armor to explain why they survive situations that will kill anyone else, and secondary characters are one-note without any coherent personality aside from being zany and weird.

On the other hand, this movie is far more entertaining that my previous paragraph may lead folks to believe. A very nice surprise here is how well the two lead actors gel together produce entertaining banters and one-liners like they are a professional stand-up duo or something. Sure, many of the jokes fall flat, but there is an ingrained chemistry between the two leads and the rest of the cast members that makes it easy for me to just laugh along anyway. When the jokes do hit, though, well, this movie has its share of funny moments, that’s for sure.

Also, the novelty of a horror film set in the world of wrestling is a charming kind. Sure, this may wear off by the time the sequel rolls in, but it’s pretty amusing nonetheless to see how heels and faces deal with an incoming zombie invasion. I also won’t lie, I have a fine time looking at all the hot-bodied guys in spandex. Plus, I love me a movie that isn’t afraid of poking fun at how wrestlers are all juiced like it’s a fresh fruit festival. Yes, there is also a possible nudge-nudge wink at the whole wu-flu thing, but the two screenwriters have openly denied that this is the case, so let’s just take them at their word. We don’t want to get them cancelled by the lunatics on social media for having wrongthink, after all.

One thing I also like is how the movie seems to have some brainpower gone into its creation. Some scenes are pretty obvious homage to cult zombie films out there, and I’m sure it is no coincidence that the two love interests are named after the two leading ladies in Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Don’t worry, though, this one isn’t very intellectual or high brow. It wants to entertain first and foremost, and that it does well.

At any rate, this movie may have its highs and lows, but I’ve had a good time watching it and I won’t mind checking out the sequel when it comes out. Mission accomplished, in other words.