Main cast: Ewan McGregor (Obi-Wan Kenobi), Moses Ingram (Inquisitor Reva), O’Shea Jackson Jr (Roken), Vivien Lyra Blair (Leia Organa), Maya Erskine (Sully), Indira Varma (Tala Durith), Kumail Nanjiani (Haja Estree), Marisé Álvarez (Nyche), Rupert Friend (The Grand Inquisitor), James Earl Jones (The Voice of Darth Vader), Jimmy Smits (Senator Bail Organa), and Hayden Christensen (Darth Vader)
Director: Deborah Chow
In light of all the expose about Disney now, I can only wonder whether Obi-Wan Kenobi is always meant to fail as some kind of easy tax write-off.
After all, Uwe Boll spent the better part of two decades making some of the worst movies in the entire history of human civilization, because investing in his movies was an easy way to get a tax write-off of up to 50% just like that. Maybe there is a similar kind of loophole in America?
That will likely explain the sharp descent in quality in all these Disney+ shows and movies, now mishandled by nobodies with no talent and no experience but can be hired for cheap. That explains how this show makes The Book of Boba Fett look like a masterpiece, what with the awful CW reject-tier story and acting.
They also probably didn’t want people to watch this thing, hence the preemptive “You are all racist because 3 people called Moses Ingram names on Twitter!” media blitz that calls all Star Wars fans racists, misogynists, and all other kinds of names. If people did tune in, then they had to do real work like cooking the books to make sure that this thing still registers as making no money.
Anyway, death is cheap in Star Wars. At least, death by lightsaber. Sure, Palpatine survived because of creative bankruptcy, but here, the Grand Inquisitor was previously stabbed in the chest with a lightsaber but hey, he’s back and looking good like he’d just come back because Rupert Friend’s lawyer reminded him that he was contractually obligated to show up on set again and he’s now putting on his best chins up face.
Reva gets stabbed by one, but she doesn’t die because she hasn’t pissed off enough people yet.
Udder gets stabbed by Reva too, but again, he doesn’t die because death is like having head lice now—you just take a short break to put the right shampoo on and voila, look who’s back, baby.
So yes, Reva is revealed to be a not-that-bad person after all, because we are talking about the new Disney determined to transform itself into the new clown school of the 21st century by making as many unnecessary, stupid spin-off shows as possible.
I don’t know anyone that has been screaming for a Reva show—they couldn’t even sell her light saber to collectors that will normally pay a few hundred bucks for anything that has a Star Wars logo on it—hence my theory about everything that these people do these days are just for tax write-offs or money laundering. Disney is broke, after all, but they still have to give the impression that it’s business as usual.
Anyway, back to Reva, so her grand plan is to spend years doing awful things under Udder just for… a chance to sneak up to him and stab him in the back with her lightsaber? Why can’t she, I don’t know, sneak up to him while he’s doing that sleeping in that chamber thing of his and pull the plug instead? There are so many things she could do to get back at him, and she instead waits decades, apparently unable to find a chance to stab him in the back (literally and figuratively) until now.
She really is stupid, isn’t she?
Even better, Udder knows what she’s up to all along, and yet he allows her to stay on and even become the Third Sister? What?
At this point, it’s pretty clear that everyone involved in the planning of the overall story line and the writing of the scripts have no affinity for whatever they are paid to do.
I suspect one could randomly drag a few people off the streets and force them to do these things, and the end product would make more sense than what I get here.
Oh, and Lala is apparently some kind of wunderkind by the power of her XX chromosome, being some kind of engineering saboteur expert or something, Tala ass-pulls some grenade at the last minute to save the day when she could have easily used it earlier to cut the length of the episode by a considerable amount (hateful hag), and Obi-Wut is sort of there, forced into an alliance of convenience with Reva because he’s just an icky white male so he is not allowed to be competent in any way.
Eff this crap. One more episode, and then, eff this crap.
