Main cast: Ewan McGregor (Obi-Wan Kenobi), Kumail Nanjiani (Haja Estree), Marisé Álvarez (Nyche), Flea (Vect Nokru), Moses Ingram (Inquisitor Reva), Vivien Lyra Blair (Leia Organa), Rupert Friend (The Grand Inquisitor), Sung Kang (The Fifth Brother), Rya Kihlstedt (The Fourth Sister), and Hayden Christensen (Darth Vader)
Director: Deborah Chow
The lore-breaking story of Obi-Wut Kenobby continues in Part II, and let me say it again: this show is so balls to the wall “I’m going to do whatever I want, eff continuity” bonkers that it is impossible to enjoy it if one couldn’t forget the past lore and treat this one as some throwaway slot filler on Disney+ that just happens to have the Star Wars brand on it.
Of course, the bigger question here is why one should do just that and not skip this altogether. That’s a valid question. My reason is pretty simple: I’m subscribed to the streaming service, so I may as well give it a pity watch as I hear the ratings weren’t so good.
Oh wait, I’m watching this after the “hot period” when these people would count all the views and then brag about the number. My bad, but then again, dear old me won’t be able to boost the sad numbers by much anyway even if I had nothing better to watch during that time.
If I happen to sound dismissive here, well, I am. Regardless of whether or not I enjoy this thing, it doesn’t matter, just like this show doesn’t matter.
After all, no one behind this show respects or gives a hoot about the pre-Disney Star Wars lore. Otherwise, these folks would realize it makes zero sense for Obi-Wut to encounter Leia instead of Luke, but these people are far more invested in how having Luke, which would at least help make this show stay faithful to established canon, will just mean there is one more icky white male character on the show, and we can’t have that.
Not that this is anything new, of course. Disney has reached this point where it matters more to them that the characters tick all their check boxes and the plot meets the approval of at least 40 sensitivity consultants. There is nothing organic about their product anymore, just mass-produced pap more focused on letting the people behind the show touch themselves because they are such enlightened, awesome human beings.
Well, Leia is still kidnapped, so Obi-Wut gives chase and somehow ends up in Night City in the Cyberpunk 2077 game. I have no idea how he gets there, and I don’t think he does either. The kids he bumps into just sort of lead him to Leia, and yay, that’s awesome and remember, people, kids are smart geniuses, as Leia demonstrates here. She may be tiny and young, but she is precocious and all-smart, like the mini version of all the obnoxious, insufferable, rude, and patronizing “strong female leads” plaguing these shows nowadays.
Meanwhile, Idiot-quisitor Reva is hot on Obi-Wut’s tail and this time around, she demonstrates that she can get the info she needs by reading her victims’ minds. Wait, then why didn’t she do this in the previous episode? Also, she and the other ex-Jedi twats recall that they can sense the presence of other Jedi twats… when they couldn’t seem to in the previous episode?
The production is weird too. For example, early in this episode, Obi-Wut stumbles into Night City, and the dramatic music swells in the background… as he just staggers along the street and glares wearily at passers-by. What is the dramatic music for? Is it to distract me from how mundane the scene actually is?
Along the way, he spots some guy from Kara-Tur, a dwarf from Waterdeep… I knew it, the people behind this show got all their fantasy and sci-fi “education” by watching a few episodes of Critical Role!
The biggest insult, of course, is the appearance of Darth Vader in the final scene because why not. The episode has shoved its feces-smeared finger rudely up my nostril by this point; it may as well wiggle the finger around while trying to reach my brain.
A stupid, stupid script, lots of ass-pull moments, and Ewan McGregor acting like he’d finally realized he’d walked into a career mistake… I was okay with the previous episode, and I never expected things to go downhill this fast.
May the Force be with me, indeed, as there are god knows how many more episodes I’d have to sit through after this.
