The Pseudopod That Rocks the Cradle by Tim Mendees
Best title ever?
Malignant (2021)
Typical character here: I’ll keeping walking in this dark hallway and count the number of jump scares before I get killed…
Escape from Castle Quarras by Douglas Niles
Why is “escape” in the title, when you’re actually breaking in?
Free Guy (2021)
Glad I waited for it to hit streaming!
The Viscount’s Tempting Minx by Erica Ridley
This is a fun job interview story alright.
The Sum of Us (1994)
Teddypig has six magic words for y’all: young Russell Crowe in a towel.
Candyman (2021)
White people suck, white cops must die… these people recall that this is supposed to be a horror film, right?
Bug House by Amy Parker
Don’t let the cover fool you, as this is more of a psychological tale than a killer bug romp.
The Play Is the Thing by Brendol James
Hot tip: to seduce a straight guy into spreading them buns for your hot dog, just get them in a play. It’s that simple!
They Come Knocking (2019)
They come boring, more like. The true horror stems from the annoying central-casting characters.
