Category:2 Oogies

The Gates (2023)

The cast is solid, the characters are interesting, but my god, the movie is so freaking dull.

Same old crap, but with resurrection magic now.

The heroine is meant for the larder, but ends up being a different, more fun kind of meal instead.

The final episode of the first season is a dreary waste of time. Have they all given up already?

Only these people can make an episode about a horny priest so underwhelming.

Fiction about gay guys, in ways that women wish all gay guys would be.

The heroine is one of the worst wretches I’ve come across in a while. Reject with prejudice!

I can’t help thinking of a particularly mean line from Ingrid Michaelson’s Boys Chase Girls while reading this.

A hot woman shags and dumps her prey, causing them to go cray cray and off themselves. How cute.

This boring season comes to a hilariously pointless and dumb closure. Oh, and meet a more OP Sue than Captain Marvel!