Desire Me Only by Thea Devine

Posted September 14, 2001 by Mrs Giggles in 1 Oogie, Book Reviews, Genre: Erotica / 0 Comments.

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Desire Me Only by Thea Devine

Desire Me Only by Thea Devine

Zebra Lovegram, $4.99, ISBN 0-8217-5666-4
Historical Erotica, 1997

oogie-1

Desire Me Only sees Thea Devine on a really bad day. Toned down sex, so much hate, and absolutely no romance, unless you count the “Romance” word on the spine.

This one is about Lady Diandra Reynell and her sister Selena leaving India to live with Diandra’s stepson Justin. They hatehatehatehate each other, but they meet in some deserted maze-like thing under their estate for hate-filled shagging. I’m talking about Diandra and Justin, not Diandra and Selena, so I hope you aren’t expecting anything else. These shagging sessions are short, toned-down, and not at all erotic, more like perfunctory, especially when Justin is boinking a woman he is sure murdered his father.

A thousand minus points for the ghastly image of Diandra hysterically splatting and rubbing Justin’s, ahem, cream all over her kittens. Is aloe vera out of fashion already? Mind you, she doesn’t bathe after her beauty treatment, so I can only imagine how she stinks to high heaven when she serves tea to those British marms. Hmm, that’s a thought. Too bad the author never presents a scene like that one. Seriously, I still give a shudder whenever I pass the toiletries and cosmetics section in the supermarket downtown.

The finale is one silly melodrama, of course, no question about that. This is Thea Devine, Queen of Over-the-top Conspiracies we are talking about here. But the incessant hatehatehate bickering, punctuated by that icky beauty treatment (does the author know something about the properties of male fluids that I don’t – endowment amelioration properties, perhaps?) and perfunctory sex give me a really headsplitting migraine.

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Mrs Giggles

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She's practically the lich queen of the community, having been around since the 1990s. She'd probably still be around for another 100 years.

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