Bantam, $7.99, ISBN 978-0-553-56506-5
Historical Romance, 1994 (Reissue)

Amanda Quick’s Deception promises a tantalizing treasure hunt, complete with mysterious maps and hidden riches.

As a reader, I was initially charmed by this premise, eagerly anticipating a rollicking adventure filled with intrigue and excitement. However, the execution reveals that this story is about as thrilling as watching paint dry on a slightly damp day.

Let’s start with our hero, Jared Ryder, a man descended from a family tree that reads like a who’s who of maritime mischief-makers. Despite his piratical pedigree, Jared has taken it upon himself to be the voice of reason in this sea of chaos. His quest for an ancestor’s diary leads him to Olympia Wingfield, a spinster juggling three nephews more rambunctious than a barrel of caffeinated monkeys. Jared, being the master of orderly chaos, infiltrates this domestic circus by posing as a tutor.

Olivia, our heroine, is a delightful mix of naïveté and unearned confidence. She’s the kind of character who’d confidently declare she knows all about the world because she once saw a postcard from Paris. Her misguided attempts at worldliness lead to some genuinely amusing moments, like a kitten trying to roar like a lion. But given her background as a sheltered woman raising kids in the middle of nowhere, it’s hard not to root for her. After all, who among us hasn’t occasionally confused our limited experiences with universal truths?

Now, onto our hero, a man apparently cursed with a vocabulary more limited than a parrot’s. If I had a penny for every time he called Olivia a “siren”, I’d have enough money to buy the author a thesaurus. It’s as if the word is his security blanket, and he’s afraid to let it go. One can’t help but wonder if he thinks “siren” is some sort of magical incantation that will make Olivia swoon.

But perhaps the most tiresome aspect of this tale is the predictable relationship pattern that Ms Quick seems to have copy-pasted from her previous works. We’ve got the sudden passionate kiss that comes out of nowhere, followed by a by-the-numbers lovemaking scene that’s about as spicy as vanilla pudding. And let’s not forget the heroine’s broken record routine of insisting the hero shouldn’t marry her because he doesn’t love her. It’s as if the author is following a romance novel mail-order kit, assembling the same pieces in slightly different orders.

In conclusion, Deception that promises treasure but delivers costume jewelry. It’s hardly the exotic getaway you were hoping for. Also, Amanda Quick’s formula is becoming so predictable that one might suspect she’s outsourced her writing to a very limited AI trained exclusively on her previous novels.

Still, if you enjoy the comfort of knowing exactly what you’re going to get—right down to the number of times the hero will call the heroine a “siren”—then this book might be just the ticket for a rainy afternoon read.