John Carter (2012)
Boring, boring, boring, boring, boring, boring.
Category:Film Reviews
Underworld: Awakening (2012)
Best watched with brain shut down and minimal expectations – it may actually be fun if you do that.
Dark Skies (2009)
Oh no, acid rain is killing everyone! More importantly, look at Shawn Roberts’s butt!
Stake Land (2010)
This is a pleasant surprise: it’s both emotional and suspenseful in a tiny little indie package.
Abduction (2011)
Cast a guy more well known for his shirtless scenes, and then have him “act” with his clothes on. The result is just as you’d expect.
Immortals (2011)
Oh god, everyone involved in this putrid mess has better have a strong word with his or her agent.
Pornography: A Thriller (2009)
Bore-nography.
Pig Hunt (2008)
The man-eating pig is so cute in this bizarre comedy-horror thing.
Animals (2008)
At least the cast looks easy on the eyes, I suppose. No other reason to waste time on this dud.
The River Murders (2011)
This is a late night cable filler show passed off as a movie.
