Avon, $5.99, ISBN 0-380-78935-3
Historical Romance, 1998
Ah, Julia Quinn’s first foray into the well-trodden path of spy romance. One might hope for a fresh take, but alas, Ms Quinn opts for the literary equivalent of reheated leftovers. It’s comfort food, sure, but hardly Michelin star quality.
To Catch an Heiress follows the misadventures of a quirky heiress on the run and a jaded spy who mistakes her for his target. Their collision sets off a series of events involving mistaken identities, espionage, and of course, reluctant romance.
Our hero, Blake Ravenscroft (a name that sounds like it was pulled from a How to Name Your Regency Rake handbook), is about as memorable as beige wallpaper. He’s the poster child for the “hurt-before-can’t-love-again” trope, clinging to his emotional baggage like it’s the last lifeboat on the Titanic. His constant push-and-pull with the heroine is less romantic tension and more like watching someone play emotional ping-pong with themselves.
We’re told Blake’s the best spy in the land, but that’s like bragging about being the tallest hobbit in the Shire when your main competition is the heroine. Speaking of whom, Caroline Trent is quirky in a way that makes you wonder if she’s auditioning for a role in a Victorian sitcom. Her coughing fits to avoid speaking aren’t so much endearing as they are concerning—is this a romance novel or a tuberculosis PSA? Her perpetual cheer teeters dangerously close to the edge of mania, making you wonder if there’s a dark, twisted version of Caroline just waiting to break free.
The plot unfolds with all the suspense of a paint-by-numbers kit. Will a villain appear to threaten our heroine? Will our hero swoop in to save the day? Will there be a passionate love scene that magically resolves all their issues? Spoiler alert: yes, yes, and yes. It’s a fairy tale with more innuendo—Disney for the bodice-ripper set.
To be fair, Julia Quinn’s trademark banter does shine through, even if it sometimes makes our leads seem more like animated woodland creatures than actual humans. You might find yourself chuckling despite your better judgment.
In the end, To Catch an Heiress is a 1990s Disney cartoon with a side of spice. It’s familiar, it’s cozy, and it’s about as grounded in reality as a floating castle. But isn’t that why we love Julia Quinn? She offers an escape to a world where problems are solved with witty repartee and passionate embraces. It may not be haute cuisine, but sometimes you just want a literary candy bar— and the author delivers with a wink and a smile.
