Main cast: Tim Conlon (Alex Grey), Cynthia Preston (Sarah Monroe), David Stratton (Shane Taylor), Jeremy Ratchford (Leonard Welsh), Dylan Neal (Andrew Douglas), and Courtney Taylor (Mary Lou Maloney)
Directors: Ron Oliver and Peter R Simpson
Every cult classic franchise has its black sheep, the film that stands so far apart from its brethren that you start wondering if someone on the production team had a particularly scandalous relationship with the mailman.
Halloween III: Season of the Witch threw out Michael Myers in favor of cursed masks. Deathstalker II winked and poked fun at its genre’s tropes with reckless abandon. And The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2? Well, that’s what happens when someone thinks “chainsaw slasher” could be a synonym for “campy vaudeville act.” These movies aren’t bad, per se; in fact, some (including this very reviewer!) might argue they’re even better than their straight-faced siblings.
Enter Prom Night III: The Last Kiss, the flamboyant, sex-crazed ghost of a high school romp that proudly dances its way into the weird but lovable club.
The Prom Night franchise started life as a Canadian slasher series, with the original and its 2008 reboot focusing on straightforward, knife-wielding vengeance. The sequels? A completely different ball game. While Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II dipped a toe into supernatural slasher waters, this movie cannonballs in, splashing around in the murky waters of horror-comedy, sexploitation, and high school satire. Somehow, it manages to juggle all three with surprising finesse—or at least enough reckless enthusiasm to make you cheer it on.
Continuity? Who needs it! Forget that whole bit from the last movie about Mary Lou Maloney possessing Michael Ironside’s character. This time, she’s serving Rockabilly Purgatory Realness, trapped in an undead chain gang that’s perpetually line-dancing. Naturally, Mary Lou escapes (after all, you can’t keep a bad ghost down) and finds herself back at her alma mater, the creatively named Hamilton High School. Having tragically burned to death in 1957 before she could snag the Prom Queen crown, Mary Lou is on a mission: snag herself a Prom King and rule the school… even if that means killing everyone who gets in her way.
Enter Alex Weston, a walking definition of high school mediocrity, whose greatest achievements include being average at football and not flunking out of chemistry. Mary Lou seduces Alex with promises of success, passion, and a lifetime supply of detention-worthy antics. Sure, he already has a sweet girlfriend, Sarah, but why let that get in the way of becoming the most popular kid in school? Unfortunately for Alex, Mary Lou’s idea of “happily ever after” involves him joining her in the afterlife. Forever.
This film is a camp-aign for the ages, unapologetically reveling in high school tropes and hormonal hijinks. Sure, the humor can be juvenile—cue a health class where students are subjected to 1950s propaganda warning that talking to a strange man will turn a woman into a drug-addicted tramp—but it’s all part of the charm. Where the movie truly shines is in its parody of Fatal Attraction-style obsession. Mary Lou is the embodiment of toxic ex energy, channeling equal parts seduction and straight-up murder into her quest for love.
Courtney Taylor’s Mary Lou is a delightfully deranged femme fatale, oozing charisma with every lingering glance and sultry quip. She’s the kind of ghost who will kill your math teacher but still leave you wondering if she’s worth the trouble. Taylor plays the role with such gleeful abandon that you can’t help but be mesmerized. Sexy? Yes. Scary? Occasionally. In control? Always. Even her lingerie-clad dance to Yvonne Murray’s The Last Kiss Will Be Mine feels purposeful—a demonstration of her seductive power rather than gratuitous fanservice.
-Mary Lou isn’t the only strong female character here. Alex’s girlfriend Sarah refuses to be a passive bystander. She delivers one of the best lines of the movie—“I don’t get mad; I bake”—and proves it by spending her screen time plotting, baking, and fighting a ghostly rival for her boyfriend’s soul. By the time she takes Alex back, it’s clear it’s on her terms.
Alex, bless his simple little heart, is the least compelling member of this bizarre love triangle. Tim Conlon gives the role a try, but his clean-cut good looks and chiseled physique make it hard to buy him as an underachieving schlub. Plus, his attempts to express terror and confusion often fall flatter than Mary Lou’s prom date in 1957.
Still, Mr Conlon does fine as the beleaguered straight man to Mary Lou’s unhinged antics, and he gets bonus points for being the only cast member in the movie willing to bare it all. The willie slip is probably accidental, but still, it’s truly a sacrifice for art.
If Prom Night III: The Last Kiss were a student at Hamilton High, it’d win the “Most Likely to Be Remembered as That Weird Kid You Secretly Loved” title. It’s ridiculous, raunchy, and often absurd, but it’s also irresistibly fun. Whether you’re here for the over-the-top kills, the cheesy one-liners, or the sight of a ghost queen wreaking havoc in a football locker room, this movie delivers. It might not be a masterpiece, but it’s the best kind of black sheep—a film that dares to stand out and go full ham.
So, dust off your VHS player, dig up your corsage, and give this movie a spin. It’s not just a movie; it’s a supernatural prom-posal you won’t want to decline. Just don’t forget to RSVP.
