Main cast: Ewan McGregor (Obi-Wan Kenobi), Moses Ingram (Inquisitor Reva), Vivien Lyra Blair (Leia Organa), Kumail Nanjiani (Haja Estree), Marisé Álvarez (Nyche), O’Shea Jackson Jr (Roken), Maya Erskine (Sully), Joel Edgerton (Owen Lars), Bonnie Piesse (Beru Lars), Rupert Friend (The Grand Inquisitor), Simone Kessell (Breha Organa), Ian McDiarmid (Emperor Palpatine), James Earl Jones (The Voice of Darth Vader), Jimmy Smits (Senator Bail Organa), and Hayden Christensen (Darth Vader)
Director: Deborah Chow
So, what do these geniuses serve in Episode VI, the grand finale of one the worst piece of Star Wars crap ever?
Emperor Poo-poo-tine, because he’s never been in any of these shows since forever and surely, people can’t get enough of him!
Yay, another lightsaber duel between Obi-Wut and Darth Udder, only filmed in cheapo filters and far worse choreography than the other fights that these two ever had!
Yay, Lala being told that she is the hope for the future, because she would… uh, achieve absolutely nothing of consequence aside from becoming Mary Poppins of space? Seriously, Disney’s storytelling geniuses completely obliterated all her achievements in the original trilogy, and these same people now claim Lala is the shining light of what-freaking-ever?
Moses Ingram crying as Reva and making me dread at the idea of watching her starring in that upcoming Reva series that these people for some reason believe is a good idea. God, I hope she gets some acting lessons between this and her show, because that crying scene makes me die inside from second-, third-, and fourth-hand embarrassment.
Joel Edgerton looking hot in the few scenes he is in, well, that’s something good at least.
In the meantime, the good guys survive because, not that they are awesome—what with Obi-Wut barely displaying any skills that befit his Jedi Master training throughout the series—rather, because Udder for some reason just keeps letting them get away.
Meanwhile, in the climactic moment, Udder sent some Death Stars to chase them, but they just seem to evaporate into thin air, never being seen or mentioned ever again, probably because the clowns behind this show realize that their time on clock is up and they have better close shop then and find another IP to wreck beyond recognition.
Sure, this episode is slightly better than the last few, but that’s like saying that swallowing dried fecal materials is easier than ingesting fresh ones.
So, here ends this series, in which nothing of consequence happens aside from horrid acting, horrendous screenwriting, and enough lore breaking.
The last bit makes this show worth a look only for masochistic people that want to test their own Star Wars lore by trying to count how many times this show obliterates the ass out of the lore. Everyone else that isn’t paid by Disney to shill everything it craps out should do well to avoid this turd like it’s a super-rabid variant of whatever virus Big Pharma is hoping to profit off now.
RIP Obi-Wan Kenobi, and eff off.
