Main cast: Leah Harvey (Cassidy Taimak), Arthur Lee (Kai), Max Rinehart (Julius), Dimitri Abold (Rade), Rachel Handshaw (Sladie), Laura Bailey (Smokes), Louis Martin (Callosian Officer), Derek Phillips (Lennox), Kerry Gutierrez (Spitz), Darin De Paul (Bartender, Narrator), Clay Savage (Guild Security Officer), and William Calvert (Guild Security Officer)
Directors: Patrick Osborne and Dave Wilson

Boy, had I been drinking when I see the title of this episode, I’d have choked because Concord is one of the worst, if not the worst, flops in video game history. It had two, I believe, open betas in which one was free for everyone to take part in, and yet the player count was ludicrously and hilariously low.

Still, Sony defiantly released this game anyway… and pulled the plug on it as well as refunded all the folks that paid for it two weeks later.

Why did this game fare so disastrously? Well, I hadn’t had the opportunity to play even if I wanted to, and no, I didn’t want to heh, but from what I heard:

• The gameplay is actually alright, but it feels a lot like many of the FPS games already out there, like Overwatch, Valorant, etc.
• Which puts Concord at a disadvantage because it is charging people to buy this game when those established bigger games are free to play.
• Concord needs to have a good reason to entice those players, who tend to be loyalists to their favorite FPS games, and “feels like those games, but not free, come try it anyway” isn’t a good selling point.
• Also, people are shallow, and first impression matters. However, the designs of the player characters in this game are exactly what you expect when you hire artists from Tumblr with a portfolio of fat lesbians and fat lesbian furries and then run their designs through several layers of scrutiny by sensitivity consultants: bland, forgettable designs without any hint of uniqueness, attractiveness, anything. 
• Then, publicize this game by announcing the pronouns of each of these characters, because that’s what normies really care about. Yes, there is a robot that looks like a trashcan, and yes, it has pronouns, and you better make sure you don’t misgender it or the fat one will come sit on your face in a non-sexual way and you will regret your sordid ways soon enough.
• Yes, have one of the player characters look like a beach ball that can inexplicably run and roll like a lifelong athlete, and wonder why people meme on this game instead of running out to buy it.
• Did I mention that Sony spent $400 million on this game, convinced that it would be the new IP like Star Wars? Those out of touch suits in that company aren’t wrong, though, if they are talking about present day Star Wars…

Having said that, Concord: Tale of the Implacable is unexpectedly good fun. Sure, it has its wrung-through-the-DEI-grinder moments, with the only white guy turning out to be the villain (shocker, I know), and the tale of the ragtag crew of the Implacable feels a lot like a side tangent in the sea of Guardians of the Galaxy clones. 

However, the characters here look far cooler than the game ones, in spite of keeping to the same aesthetics, and damn, some of the scenes are so beautiful to look at that they make me feel like I’ve found the true meaning of life. Also, that Chinese or Japanese guy is so hot that for a brief second I feel a lot of empathy for people that want to have sordid love affairs with cartoon characters.

The story, while predictable, moves fast and feels complete in its short runtime. The short runtime also means that the typical abrasive girlboss type doesn’t outstay her welcome. 

This episode then has a very unnecessary epilogue that tries to tie it to the disastrous game reveal cinematic trailer, which only to reminds me of what a hilarious tragicomedy that Concord turned out to be. 

Still, all in all, this is a solid, entertaining episode with some magnificent visual clutter. It is everything the game likely isn’t, from what I see from gameplay videos, so oh well, for all its fault, that game brings us this episode. Rest in peace, Concord, you lasted about as long as Daw’s New Year’s resolution at an all-you-can-eat buffet.