Main cast: Houston Rhines (Gabriel), Michael Teh (Michael), Nicola Posener (Hannah), Li Jing (Lola), William Legue (Ty), Ivica Dimitrijevic (Dominic), Caroline Amiguet (Valentina), Tommy Nash (Antonio), Ivy Aissaoui (Jem), Nicholas Turturro (Newton), and Michael Madsen (Balthazar)
Director: Ali Zamani
Eric Roberts is in Angels Fallen, but strangely, his name is never in the main credits. Maybe he’s embarrassed to be seen in this, which is saying something considering that he’d show up in anything and everything that waves a paycheck at him, or maybe the people doing the opening credits forgot to put his name in.
Heaven knows, this show is embarrassingly incompetent as it is.
This super low budget movie is about some demon hunters roaming the same four or five set pieces to look for some big bad Horsemen of the Apocalypse-y demons that for some reason spend a lot of time playing billiard in some janky club while waiting to be found. The main guy, Gabriel, has the obligatory “My family is dead, I want revenge!” cliché background, but that’s as deep as the script gets when it comes to giving any of these walking meat bags any semblance of a character.
I wish I can say that this movie is earnest, action packed, or even horrifically bad enough to be an unintentional comedy, but it’s instead so freaking dull.
Scenes after scenes consist of these actors standing around mumbling their clunky lines in the same three shade of monotone, looking vaguely embarrassed and lost. Nothing else happens for the most part. The camera tries to hide the fact that these people are shambling around the same locations over and over by capturing their faces up close as possible, but sadly, there is nothing here but boredom to be had.
When the show manages to collect enough pocket change after paying the salaries of Eric Roberts and Michael Madsen—I hope these gentlemen are proud of themselves—I get the very occasional scene of bad CGI that looks like it had been done with incompetence and a lot more resentment. This, along with the lifeless script, means that there is absolutely nothing worth sitting through this thing for.
Well, Ivy Aissaoui valiantly takes off her clothes to keep people awake, but really, while her efforts are commendable, there’s really little she can do to salvage this thing. This is one movie that has given up completely right from the opening credits.
