Main cast: Victor Garber (David Woodrow Randolph, David’s Clone), Guy Burnet (John Hunter), Casey Thomas Brown (Jordan), Dagmara Dominczyk (Anka Kieslowski), and David Deblinger (Doctor Ziegler)
Director: Max Winkler
Clone is yet another addition to the seemingly endless buffet of the American Horror Story franchise, where it’s always Halloween and the spookiness has varying expiration dates. I’ll admit, I jumped off the American Horror Story train back around Season 6, when it felt like the writers were throwing ideas at a wall just to see what oozed down. But with the anthology’s short-form approach of American Horror Stories, I figured, why not risk a goosebump or two?
Enter Victor Garber, a man who’s aged like fine wine in a show that sometimes ages like milk. Mr Garber plays David Woodrow Randolph, a fabulously rich guy with a fabulous house and, naturally, a much younger husband named John. John is the classic boy-toy—think eye candy with a few quirks and a closet full of curated loungewear. Their setup is a familiar one: rich man, younger hustler. It’s a pairing as old as time, or at least as old as Tom Ford’s first fragrance.
Things take a turn when David has a stroke and—plot twist or plot predictable—reveals he’s had a clone made of himself to keep John company. Because when you’re a billionaire, there’s no such thing as too much self-love. Now John has David 2.0, a kinder, gentler, and all-around better version of his original hubby. It’s like upgrading from an iPhone 6 to an iPhone 15, except with fewer software glitches and more existential dread.
The clone and John start getting cozy, and I can’t blame him—if my partner came with all the same perks and none of the mood swings, I’d probably catch feelings too. Just as things are getting steamy, David the Original stages his inevitable comeback, and suddenly John’s love life becomes a complicated ménage à trois featuring only two people. Talk about double trouble.
The horror factor is low, so low it’s practically subterranean. Let’s be real: Clone is about as scary as finding out your favorite Starbucks drink is seasonal. Sure, it tries to touch on themes of identity and companionship, but it doesn’t bring anything new to the ‘partner is actually a glorified robot’ trope. At least we dodged the “rogue AI tries to murder everyone” cliché, though I half-expected David 2.0 to suddenly download an update that turns him into the Terminator.
Still, Mr Garber’s dry wit and ability to deliver even the most ludicrous lines with gravitas keep the episode afloat. He plays both roles with a finesse that almost makes you forget that the plot is thinner than John’s patience whenever David throws a tantrum. Watching him argue with himself is kind of like witnessing an Oscar-worthy performance trapped in a B-movie plotline—delightfully ridiculous.
Let’s be honest, though: the real star of the show is that stunning house, complete with sleek modern furnishings and a view to die for. If the show wants to explore AI, give me a smart house that does the laundry, cooks dinner, and throws shade when I eat ice cream straight out of the tub. Now that’s the kind of tech innovation we all deserve.
In the end, Clone is a weird little romp that never fully leans into horror or sci-fi. It’s like being served a slice of cake and realizing it’s mostly frosting—sweet enough to keep you interested, but lacking substance. If nothing else, it’s a good reminder that even in 2024, the idea of finding the perfect partner is still science fiction!
