Paizo, $19.99, ISBN 978-1-60125-451-1
Fantasy, 2012
Prestige Classes vs Archetypes: A Crash Course in Overcomplication
Prestige classes are like that weird hobby your uncle picked up at 50. Sure, it’s different, but is it really necessary? These are special roles your characters can aspire to, offering unique abilities and flavor once you jump through enough hoops to make an Olympic gymnast dizzy.
Archetypes, on the other hand, are the sensible shoes of character customization. You get them at character creation, they actually make your character better, and they don’t require an extra spreadsheet to keep track of.
Now, the brilliant minds behind Pathfinder have admitted that prestige classes aren’t meant to be powerful. Oh no, that would be too simple. Instead, they’re for “flavor” and “narrative depth” because nothing says “epic hero” like sacrificing effectiveness for a fancy title.
The Good, the Bad, and the “What Were They Thinking?”
Aldori Swordlord
Kicking off our parade of peculiarities is the Aldori Swordlord, whose artwork suggests the artist might have been hitting the fantasy mushrooms a bit hard. With a neck that would make a penanggalan jealous, this fellow is ready to duel anything—including basic anatomy. Great in one-on-one fights, but put him against a group, and he’s about as useful as a marshmallow teapot.
Arclord of Nex
Ah, the Arclord of Nex, for when you want to play a wizard but with extra steps. They’ve got spells coming out of their ears and can teleport like nobody’s business. Just don’t expect them to take a hit—they’re about as durable as a soap bubble in a hurricane.
Aspis Agent
For the player who always wanted to be a cartoon villain but thought it lacked nuance. Great at sneaking and poisoning, terrible at making friends and influencing people. Hope you’ve got deep pockets, because those poisons aren’t going to buy themselves.
Bellflower Tiller
Robin Hood meets your local gardening club. Their main strength? Forming a group and running away really fast. Because nothing says “hero” like being really good at escaping.
Blackfire Adept
For when you want to summon demons AND set things on fire but can’t decide which edgy trope to commit to. Just don’t expect much versatility… or friends.
Brother of the Seal
Imagine a monk who moonlights as a magical locksmith. Sounds cool, right? Wrong. They’re still a monk, which in Pathfinder terms means they’re about as effective as a wet paper bag in a sword fight.
Champion of Irori
A monk with delusions of paladin-hood, or vice-versa. Hope you like arbitrary restrictions, because this class has more rules than a bureaucrat’s wet dream.
Daggermark Poisoner
Poison enthusiasts, rejoice! Just be prepared to live in poverty, because apparently, toxins are the new gold standard.
Dawnflower Dissident
Despite the sunny name, this class is shadier than a forest at midnight. Great for framing others and causing chaos, terrible for maintaining any semblance of a moral compass. This is not going to douse those rumors that Sarenrae is actually a Whore Queen disguised.
Golden Legionnaire
The MMORPG tank that got lost on its way to World of Warcraft. Great at soaking damage, not so great at… well, anything else.
Gray Gardener
For when you want to be evil, but with style. Blends stealth and judgment like a sinister smoothie. Just don’t expect to be invited to any heroic parties.
Green Faith Acolyte
You’d think followers of the Green Faith would make awesome druids but nope! It’s about challenging others to advance. Because nothing says “one with nature” like picking fights.
Hellknight Signifier
Trading spell power for edgy armor? Sign me up! Said no one ever. But hey, at least you’ll look cool while being outclassed by every other spellcaster.
Knight of Ozem
The vanilla ice cream of prestige classes. Does the job, whatever that is, but doesn’t exactly set the world on fire.
Lantern Bearer
A mix of archer, spellcaster, and ranger. Jack of all trades, master of none, and apparently, elves only (half-elves get to sit at the third-class table). Because humans aren’t allowed to have nice things.
Magambiyan Arcanist
For when regular spellcasting just isn’t complicated enough. Now you can cast druid spells as arcane spells! Because that’s definitely what the game needed—more spell options to keep track of.
Mammoth Rider
Fantastic for open plains, hilarious in dungeons. Hope you like spending most of your adventures saying, “I’ll wait outside with Fluffy.”
Pit Fighter
Works even without a crowd, which begs the question: why call it a Pit Fighter? Might as well call it “Guy Who Likes to Hit Things.”
Prophet of Kalistrade
If you ever wanted to play a character whose main ability is being really, really boring, boy do I have the class for you!
Razmiran Priest
A fake priest class designed for NPCs. Because apparently, we needed rules for charlatans. Playing one is like choosing to be the person who sends spam emails for a living.
Riftwarden
Created to counter the Blackfire Adept. Because what this game really needed was more rock-paper-scissors with character classes.
Shieldmarshal
A gunslinger-inquisitor hybrid. Because nothing says “balanced” like combining two already questionable classes.
Skyseeker
Angry dwarf fighters with extra steps of questionable use. Next!
Sleepless Detective
Apparently inspired by Robert Downey Jr’s Sherlock Holmes, but with none of the charm and twice the impracticality.
Storm Kindler
For when you’ve always wanted to play as a weather phenomenon. Great for outdoor campaigns, useless everywhere else. Unless you want to troll everyone in a small room, that is.
Tattooed Mystic
Trading three levels of spellcasting for some cool tattoos that have very limited and inflexible uses. Because who needs magic when you can have sick ink?
Umbral Court Agent
Another class that trades spellcasting for gimmicks. Teleporting through shadows is cool and all, but have you tried just being a better wizard?
Veiled Illusionist
This prestige class actually becomes powerful after level 8. Mark your calendars, folks—that’s only two years of real-time play!
Now, the Pièce de Résistance
Winter Witch
Because one Winter Witch wasn’t confusing enough, let’s have two!
That’s right, this prestige class shares the same name as the archetype. Enjoy explaining “Winter Witch 8/Winter Witch 1” to your already bewildered party members.
Really great for making cold spells super effective, useless when the campaign inevitably shifts to a desert setting.
Don’t think you will rule in the Arctic climes either, as let’s face it: most of the critters there are either resistant or immune to cold.
Still, you can make fancy sculptures out of water. You’ll be a hit at birthday parties!
Noble Scion
At first glance, a class for players who hate being good at things.
But wait! You get a follower of just one level below you pretty quickly as well as weekly stipend and free money as you level up. Your crew needs magical weapons? Shopping time! Oh, your crew must gain an audience with the king? You’re a noble, just get into the carriage. Is there a super secret ball that your crew needs to attend? You are famous and hot, so you don’t even need an invitation to get in!
Congratulations, you’re now playing Fantasy Sugar Daddy: The RPG.
Watch as your DM slowly loses their will to live as you trivialize every social encounter and buy your way through challenges. Who needs balance when you have cold, hard cash?
The Final Roll of the Die
Paths of Prestige is like a box of chocolates—if half the chocolates were filled with wasabi and the other half with existential dread.
Whether you’re a troll looking to screw up your party in new and exciting ways or a DM seeking the perfect NPC to make your players say, “What the actual fuuuu…?”, this splatbook has you covered.
Just remember that with great prestige comes great responsibility… the responsibility to explain why your character is suddenly so weird and awful, that is.
