THE AMAZING RACE

Season 9 Episode 4: It's Not Over Till the Phil Sings

Previously, Teams traveled from Brotas, Brazil to Moscow, Russia, where they dived and later chose to play with nesting dolls or clean trolley cars, three activities that of course will make you instantly think of Russia should you ever come across them. "Oh, look, Alexandre Despatie is diving into that pool - hmm, I think of Russia now!" Meanwhile, Wanda was scared of diving but she decided to do a Roadblock that talked specifically about "taking the plunge". Maybe she thought the Roadblock asked people to marry a handsome Russian looking for an US green card and she might as well spare Desiree from living out a gruesome Puerto Rican version of the movie Muriel's Wedding. Because of Wanda spazzing out and wasting a lot of time screaming that the water was out to get her and what not, the Meninas Do Gilmore ended up at the back of the pack. The Pink Poodles had to go back to collect a bag that they left behind as well, so that put them in the same bus as the Meninas Do Gilmore, so to speak. But at the end of the previous episode, Philo explained that the leg was still not over and he had a clue to give to the first Team to meet him on the finish mat.

The show begins with a little rewinding of a few minutes from where the previous episode ended. Philo is at "Moscow, Russia", as per the caption, and look, the Freaky Fratboys are running across the Red Square, looking for Philo. The LaMichies are also running, but the Freaky Fratboys are the first to reach Philo despite Lake's best imitation of a train engine to propel himself forward. The fact that he was carrying both his and Michelle's bags may have something to do with him being slower to the mat than the Freaky Fratboys. Right now, Michelle is shaping up to be a useless and loud baggage of a Team partner and, if patterns of editing of previous seasons are any indication, the LaMichies seem destined to be in the final three as the compulsory "drama-providing team". But it's still early in the season so I suppose only time will tell. The Freaky Fratboys say something about "big Philly style" as they reach Philo and wooh-wah accordingly when they learn that the leg is still not over yet. Philo hands them a clue that tells them to head over more than 1,000 miles to Frankfurt, Germany, and then take a train to Stuttgart 100 miles from Frankfurt. At Stuttgart, Teams will locate what Philo calls "the flagship Mercedes-Benz factory" for their next clue. That factory is more famous for its Mercedes-Benz museum, by the way.

Jeremy asks Eric how they will go to Frankfurt. Eric tells them that they have to go to the airport. Phew, for a moment there I'm expecting them to start running all the way to Frankfurt. I'm somewhat disappointed that they don't. The LaMichies step on the mat next and Michelle goes "Shoot!" when they unhappily realize that the leg isn't over yet. Meanwhile, the Freaky Fratboys find a cab to take them to the airport. Eric is inspired by the sight of the Red Square and the buildings such as St Basil's Cathedral to say that the place will be a "prime spot to be holding hands with the chicks". Eric says that the place isn't so romantic since it's just the two of them. Jeremy goes on to say that it's pretty gay for the two of them to be seen in the Red Square, unlike the prime displays of heterosexuality these guys displayed when they posed in their underwear with each other or with their male buddies and had these photos spread online. In the LaMichies' cab, Michelle isn't as struck by the romance of the Red Square as those two sensitive college drop-outs in the cab ahead of them, instead feeling more excited by the fact that they seem to be the second Team to arrive at the Red Square.

I don't know how much later it is when the Telcoms arrive to meet Philo, but the day seems much brighter than it was when the previous two Teams met Philo. After getting their clue, Ray hopes that they can somehow find a flight to leave by tonight so that they will be ahead of the other Teams. What makes him so sure that the other Teams can't catch up with them on that flight that may or may not be available, I don't know. Oh, and what's with that big red thing Yolanda is wearing on her head? Back at the Theatre of a Million Nesting Dolls, the FranBarries are moaning and groaning until Barry finds their clue among a nesting doll and then they take off to meet Philo.

Ahead, the BoHo Boys are pretending to be sad about the FranBerries being eliminated from the Race. It's all part of their masterplan to Get Everyone To Love Them As The Best Team Ever, of course. Nothing they do is spontaneous, everything is premeditated, and all things done have one common goal: maximum fame and positive widespread recognition. I don't know if you've been keeping score but their antics so far are either stupefyingly wit-free exclamations and hollers or calculated mimicry of the actions of popular Teams in previous seasons like the Sideshow Bobs, the Frat Bastards, and the Tubby Sibs. When they reach Philo, they give Philo a dollar, which was exactly what Team MIA, Andre and Damon, did in the third season that made many fans chuckle. Of course, Tyler quickly snatches the dollar back from Philo because they really don't want Philo to take the money. He tells Philo, "Don't waste this opportunity, Phil!" which is a pretty blatant attempt to tell Philo that he knows and is pretending to have read the vanity book that Philo put out a while back called No Opportunities Wasted. "Trying too hard" is too kind a label for the BoHo Boys, really.

The BoHo Boys then spot the FranBerries coming up to Philo. Never wasting any opportunity to make themselves heard, Tyler starts acting like he has just wet his pants and he wants everyone to know it, saying the FranBerries are here and he is so happy that the FranBerries are still in "it". Oh yes, they're friends of old people too, have they told you that? They are the best Team ever, they know it, and they want all of you to know it too. Both Teams get into cabs where the the FranBerries refer to themselves in third person and the BoHo Boys get into the same act about the Old People Will Return Triumphant or something like that. After contributing "t-tow" to the lexicon of this show, something that we will all cherish them forever for, the BoHo Boys now bring up another gem that they have spent a long time thinking up just for this show: "It isn't over until the Phil sings!" The camera cuts to a building where a sign lights up to say "PHIL". That's a nice edit. It'll be even nicer if the sign falls onto the BoHo Boys' cab.

This is only the fourth episode of the season and I am already so tired of listening and watching to the Porno Alliance who will apparently at this point of the Race never ever go away. The Porno Alliance are doing very well. Why do they have to be crass and unoriginal showboaters in the process?

Over at the trolley depot, Teams frantically clean and scrub while moaning and declaring how much the task sucks (that would be Monica). The Meninas Do Gilmore finally manage to satisfy the supervisor and Wanda shamelessly takes the opportunity to hug the cute guy in "gratitude". I can totally relate to her actions. They leave, followed later by the Pink Poodles. Ahead at the airport, the Freaky Fratboys manage to get seats on a 7:05 pm flight, which earns the lucky ticket lady a sobriquet of "beautiful". She'll no doubt spend days dreaming of guys who either look like a babboon with receding hairline or have more than a passing resemblance to the ugly gay one from 'N Sync. The LaMichies try to get tickets to that flight but alas, no more tickets are available for that flight. "Dadgummit! Lake says in exasperation.

As the MoJos and Cool As Geek finish cleaning their trolley cars at around the same time so they also decide to share a cab to the Red Square, the Meninas Do Gilmore and the Pink Poodles are stepping on the mat together to confront Philo. Either the ladies know that this is not the Pit Stop or they have come up with some bizarre scheme to intimidate Philo with their numbers or something. They don't look too surprised to get their next clue from Philo so I suspect that it's the former. Anyway, things seem to be working in beautiful synchrony this season, eh, with the whole two-by-two thing with the Porno Alliance, the LaMichies-Telcoms "It's destiny, we'll never be apart!" thingie, the Sisterhood That Is Trailing Behind, and, of course, the How Did We Share A Cab Together Anyway thing between the MoJos and Cool As Geek? Oh, and the FranBerries are Two Pains To Watch, so that's also something working in synchrony of two's on this show. As the ladies leave in cabs for the airport, Danielle says wryly that she will staple her bag to her behind. Later, Philo greet the MoJos and finally Cool As Geek. Those two Teams also seem to be in on the fact that the leg isn't over yet. Maybe Cool As Geek talked with the other three Teams about the dual-leg in season six as they all washed their trolley cars. Lori seems particularly on to Philo because as Cool As Geek leave in their cab for the airport, she says that Philo is just being dramatic with the clues and all.

The Telcoms show up at the airport where Lake and Michelle seem genuinely pleased to meet them. In fact, the LaMichies have just gotten seats on a 9:15 pm flight and they show the Telcoms the line to queue up for those tickets. Soon, the remaining Teams all show up. The BoHo Boys wander off to a different line but the other Teams take their places behind the Telcoms.

The 7:05 pm flight arrives at Frankfurt and the Freaky Fratboys talk about how lucky they are when they make it on a train to Stuttgart apparently "by seconds". They think they are lucky. I think I am unlucky because I have to suffer watching these two. Can we just forget about them and just show them only when they reach the Pit Stop? Back at the airport, as things like this can happen sometimes, the BoHo Boys by luck just happen to stand in front of a counter that opens first and get tickets to that 9:15 pm flight. All the way down the jet way, Tyler - it's always Tyler, the Kintaro who can't shut up, isn't it? God - starts hollering things like "Hold that plane!" The remaining Teams learn that unfortunately there are no more seats available for the 9:15 pm flight.

When the 9:15 pm flight is open for boarding, the LaMichies look forced in their pleasant expressions when they meet the BoHo Boys and learn that those two are on the same flight as them. It's going to be a long flight because there's no doubt that the BoHo Boys will be hollering and shouting at every possible opportunity just to make sure that they will always be on TV: "Look! Airplane food! Woo-hoo! Hot chocolate momma! I'm drinking my coffee, woooh!" The remaining Teams realize that there are no flights to Frankfurt until 7:00 am the next morning. Unhappily, the MoJos decide to sleep in the airport while the other Teams opt to head off to some hotel to spend the night.

On the train to Stuttgart, the Freaky Fratboys ask a local whether there are any "pretty ladies" in Germany. God. These two losers are too boring for words. Do they honestly think their one-note horndog act is funny? Maybe it will be if these guys show any wit and asking for "pretty ladies" is not witty. What is the casting people thinking when they rope in these two boring witless losers is beyond me. They aren't good-looking, they don't have any special star quality, they're just boring and witless, like the Lunz brothers of the previous season. Where are the casting people fishing for contestants nowadays? The worst singles bar in the country? The Freaky Fratboys get out of the train at Stuttgart and take a cab to the famous Mercedes-Benz factory where they learn that they have to sit in a Mercedes and look excited when someone drives them around for a "test drive" before they receive their next clue. Predictably, the Freaky Fratboys will have to wait until morning to do this. In this instance, they have to wait until 8:30 am. Those two head off to a nearby hotel where they would no doubt tell the camera how gay it is that they are sleeping in the same bed while wearing matching underwear and they wish there are some hot chicks around to reaffirm their heterosexuality. And then they watch porn on TV together. And hug each other tight during the scary scenes.

The 9:15 pm flight lands in Frankfurt some time later. The LaMichies and the BoHo Boys take the train and later cabs to realize that they have best go to some hotel to sleep the rest of the night off.

At 5:00 am, the remaining Teams still stuck in Moscow line up at the counter to purchase tickets for the 7:00 am flight to Frankfurt. In Stuttgart, the Mercedes-Benz factory opens their gates to the three Teams that are waiting outside. Some German locals, no doubt told that they'd be paid extra if they play stereotypes of stern and humorless Germans, take the Teams on a test-drive and I feel as sleepy as the Teams stuck in Moscow must be. The BoHo Boys are shouting "T-tow!" as a reminder that I too should be shouting "T-tow!" all the time to demonstrate my utter love for these two self-conscious dimwits. After this boring event, the Teams learn that they will each drive these Mercedes-Benzes to a field at Bad Tolz. Alas, they won't been smashing the cars with baseball bats or setting them on fire to commemorate some fall of the Berlin wall event, as we shall soon learn.

At 11:15 am, the third flight lands in Frankfurt, allowing the remaining six Teams to make their way to Stuttgart using the pre-approved modes of transportation that they don't have to try and find out on their own. The FranBerries trail behind, as usual. Soon they are being driven around by strangers in Mercedes-Benzes before taking off in those cars on their own. Cracks start to show between Desiree and Wanda when Desiree starts getting short-fused on Wanda when Wanda botches Bad Tolz and some other local words thanks to her thick accent while trying to ask for directions. I have a hunch that Desiree is picking on more than Wanda's accent at that moment and I don't blame her. Desiree must be learning just how hard it is to be a saint trying to deal with her mother and, conversely, how easy it is to be human and be angry at her mother for a little while. She's trying to tell Wanda to speak clearly so that the locals can understand her better but what comes out instead is her tersely telling her mother that speaking in an accent makes the locals confused. As other Teams get directions from various other local sources, the Pink Poodles decide to just follow the Meninas Do Gilmore. Cool As Geek meanwhile receive some directions from a local but when the MoJos ask them whether they know how to find Ball Tolz, Cool As Geek feign ignorance. They tell the cab that their "white lies" are somewhat justified because they decide to work independently from the MoJos the moment they reach Frankfurt. That's nice, but perhaps some courtesy to let the MoJos know that their "alliance" or whatever it is they have between them is off will be nicer.

On the Autobahn, Desiree is telling Wanda that they need to go on 8 towards Munich - and they are on the right highway - but she can't see any sign pointing towards Munich like there should be on the Autobahn. The cameraman however spots a sign and catches it with his camera. The sign is over Desiree's shoulder, pointing in the opposite direction. Desiree however has the sense to follow what the cameraman is capturing on his equipment and realizes at once that they have to turn around. The Pink Poodles, following the Meninas Do Gilmore, are confused as to where the Meninas Do Gilmore are taking them. Desiree and Wanda start arguing over all kinds of big and petty matters as their stress levels soar through the roof when they realize that they can't make an U-turn until who knows how much farther down the Autobahn. Finally, Wanda decides to stop the vehicle and Desiree steps out to stop the Pink Poodles and fill in the Pink Poodles on the situation that they are both in. That will teach the Pink Poodles to blindly follow another Team.

The Freaky Fratboys reach the field in question at Bad Tolz where they realize it's time for a Roadblock. The clue asks, "Who wants to reap a reward?" This Roadblock is obviously sponsored by Travelocity because someone from a Team has to pull up cones and boots (yes, boots) to see whether there is a Travelocity gnome underneath them. There are eleven gnomes hidden under a total of 150 cones and boots. Even more perplexingly, Teams have to carry the gnome they find for the rest of the leg. Why are Travelocity product placements so awkward on this show? Why can't the Race designers find a way to incorporate Travelocity into the show without being as blatant and ridiculous as this? Why not have the Teams purchase tickets at a Travelocity agent, for example, or just make them wear Travelocity T-shirts for the whole Race? Who wants to reap a reward indeed, snort. Anyway, Jeremy finds a gnome pretty quickly and the two losers learn that they have to head over to the Bavaria Film studio in Munich. So off they go.

The LaMichies encounter a local who hilariously tells them that he is too drunk to drive but he can take a ride with them and show them where the field is. The LaMichies are pretty amused by this and gently teases him as they reach the field at the same time as the BoHo Boys. The BoHo Boys whoop and doop and shoop as they decide that BJ will do this "difficult" (as Philo puts it) task. On the other hand, Michelle doesn't even want to do this task, letting Lake do it instead. Is she ever going to do anything on this show? Maybe she's saving her strength for all those challenging mountain-climbings and what-not. Still, she is on to something when she tells Lake to ignore the dementedly dancing Tyler and follow BJ, correctly deducing that Lake would waste less time checking holes that may already have been checked by BJ. Lake finds the gnome first, causing BJ to shout-asks what the gnome looks like just as he pulls one out himself. "Like this!" he answers himself. However, the LaMichies can't head to the Bavaria Film studio yet because, as they tell the camera, they have to send their drunken buddy home first. That's so sweet and makes me feel more justified in thinking that these two aren't as bad as the show is trying so hard to make them come off as the obligatory Bickerson couple in this season. Meanwhile, Tyler "jokes" about the drunken local situation of the LaMichies, "Where did they get that German guy? Did they rent him?" Wooh, rent him! That's so hilarious, I tell you. Bwahahaha! Pffffft.

The FranBerries show up next at the field where this show sold its soul to Travelocity and Barry announces that he's only going to look at the boots instead of both the cones and the boots. That's nice. They're not just doddering and annoying but they have more madness than method to boot. Still, as luck would have it, Barry eventually finds his gnome. Barry tells the camera, in third person because both he and his wife are members of the royalty or something, that the FranBerries have hit their stride and they are, um, going to rule the world. Or something. Behind them, the Meninas Do Gilmore and the Pink Poodles realize that their attempts to turn around are successful when they end up at the same place that Desiree first realized that they were going the wrong way, only this time they are headed in the correct direction. Desiree and Wanda however are fast approaching ground zero as they continue to snap at each other. Although it seems to me in this case that Wanda is being Wanda again, high strung, and it is only Desiree who is probably so weary and exhausted that she has no strength to be calm and reasonable anymore, hence the descend of those two into petty squabblings. It happened to the best of them, like the Bates Sisters in season five while driving around Lostville in Australia, for example, when Linda was too tired to maintain a counterbalance to Kathy's pessimism, just as Desiree is right now incapable to being the voice of calm and reason that Wanda needs to rein herself in. It doesn't mean that either of the ladies is at fault. These things happen.

Ahead, at the Bavaria Film studio, the Freaky Fratboys learn that it's now time for a Detour. Philo steps out to explain that in "Break It", Teams must smash stunt bottles over each other's head to reenact some bad slapstick sitcom moment to find a bottle that has a label of "Prost" in it. That's German for "cheers" and not the host for Survivor, in case you're wondering. Oh, and they can only break a bottle each time a cuckoo clock goes off, to enhance the whole Three Stooges effect, I suppose. In "Slap It", Teams have to dance correctly a set of moves to the satisfaction of a dance troupe. Or so they are supposed to anyway, hmmph. The Freaky Fratboys opt to break bottles over each other's head as I expect them to and after wearing lederhosens that are unfortunately not designed by Santino the Great from Project Runway and making some comments about how hot the lady observing them is, start breaking bottles over each other while cursing in what they believe is a comical manner to the camera. Unfortunately, there is no blood or gore to make this scene so much sweeter.

Back at the field where gnomes go to die, the Telcoms show up and Ray locates the gnome just as the MoJos show up at the field as well. While Joseph is hunting for the gnome, Cool As Geek show up. Joseph finds his gnome first and Dave finally locates his as well. Don't ask me why the ladies don't do this Roadblock. The "six Roadblocks per person" rule seems to be still enforced judging from how it gets mentioned on some insider clips, but if that's the case, shouldn't the ladies jump at the chance to perform this Roadblock? Perhaps I've greatly underestimated them. These ladies are all waiting to climb mountains, move boulders, wrestle cows, and run up a thousand staircases!

The Freaky Fratboys keep smashing bottles as Eric asks the "hot chick" to go out with them. What, the two of them at one go? Let me guess, Eric and Jeremy are so broke or cheap that they have to chip in to pay their share of the bill? The lady says that she'll go out with them if they will pay him. Eric must have heard this a lot from his kind of women because he readily agrees. Meanwhile, Jeremy grumbles that breaking bottles over each other's head is "getting old". Yeah, that and their shtick, their age, their everything.

The LaMichies' short sidetrip to their drunk buddy's house must be short because they and the BoHo Boys show up at the Bavaria Film studio at about the same time. Both opt to break bottles. Tyler just has to announce that he needs a changing room in order to change into lederhosens because he's not wearing underwear. He is the kind of person who probably doesn't wear underwear just for scenes like this. Yes, I'm cynical. It's very easy to be cynical when I'm watching contrived people like Tyler on TV. The Freaky Fratboys eventually find the correct bottle and before they leave, they take advantage of the cameras to make the "hot chick" kiss them all over their faces. These guys are really gross. The clue tells them to head over to the Pit Stop, a 153-year old "monument to peace" called the Siegestor some ten miles away. It looks somewhat like the Arc de Triomphe in Paris and was restored only partially after sustaining heavy damages during World War II. If we want to be cynical, of course the Germans will declare the Siegestor a monument of peace since they can't call it a monument to the glory of the Bavarian army like it was supposed to be after Adolf Hitler made German patriotism a really bad thing to boast about to the rest of the world.

The LaMichies start breaking bottles. Michelle once more seems shocked that she has to have bottles broken over her head just like she was shocked when she was expected to change into a swimsuit or to clean a bus. I wonder whether she has even watched this show before she let her husband drag her onto it. Lake is suspiciously too cheerful about smashing bottles over his wife's head. The BoHo Boys are predictably camping up a stink with Tyler wanting to be hit harder in the head while ahead in the cab of monstrous stupidity the Freaky Fratboys are congratulating themselves for getting lipstick smudges all over their faces. It's because of their receding hairlines, heavily simian facial features, freakishly large heads, and grotesquely disproprtionate lips, of course, and not because of the cameras on them, oh no. These guys are studs. The LaMichies goof around with Lake playing the overexcited but earnest goofish guy while Michelle is being her aloof and whiny self, until they too get their correct bottle. The BoHo Boys finally get their clue and BJ plays to the camera by asking the clue lady to dance. After enduring the Freaky Fratboys' intrusive presence, she is probably used to obnoxious American males by now so she merely tells him how nice he is being to her.

The FranBerries show up and they decide to dance. This will take a while.

The Freaky Fratboys reach the finishing mat first. Hi, Philo. Philo asks them about the lipstick smudges on their faces, which is what they want him to do anyway, and they naturally brag about what hot studs they are. Philo calls them "the biggest Casanovas we've ever had on The Amazing Race", which is a lie because Casanova is supposed to be charming and seductive. These two guys? They need to pay to get laid, case closed. Eric says that the Pink Poodles are "sweethearts" and Jeremy proves that he is as obnoxious as Eric when he says that he hopes the Pink Poodles will show up soon so that there will be more "tongue-wrestling" going on between them. Whether there is any tongue-wrestling or not going on, kissing and telling is not the nicest thing to do on TV. Why are these two ridiculous Real World kind of losers doing on this show? I'm starting to hate this season.

As the LaMichies try to find their way to the Pit Stop, Lake tells Michelle rather brusquely that her whining and pessimism are not helping him. She hilariously starts praising him in an over-the-top manner that makes me laugh. The BoHo Boys reach the Pit Stop first and they decide that it's funny to run backwards to the mat. It's funnier if they fall on top of each other and break a nose in the process, but obviously these two must have rehearsed the whole running backward thing a lot as they get everything right. T-tow, baby! These two will be selling dolls of themselves on eBay right after the season is over because they know the whole world is in love with their wit and shtick. The VIP is a man with white beard so Tyler hollers that Santa is here. That is such a stupid and rude thing to say, it's as bad as me seeing a rotund Chinese man in Australia and hollering that I've just seen Chairman Mao. They are in Germany, not the North Pole, therefore the Santa thing is not even spot on much less funny. Tyler is just spewing random exclamations and hollers that pop into his unimaginative head that he's really coming off as a sad attention-seeker.

The LaMichies are third and they are happy. And blessedly low-key in terms of shtick and drama.

The FranBerries half-heartedly dance with no sync, no rhythm, and definitely not correctly, but they get the clue anyway. On one hand, I understand that maybe the dancers don't want to see two useless old fools suffer, but on the other hand, sheesh, why lay down rules that no one seriously intends to enforce? What's the point?

The MoJos reach the Bavaria Film studio and laugh as they start breaking bottles. Cool As Geek beat the Telcoms to the clue stand but the Telcoms beat them back in reaching the Detour site as Lori has problems pulling her lederhosen on. Ray is worried that his own lederhosen will give him problems as he believes that he has put them on backwards, and Yolanda teases him by saying that it's just his butt that is too big. Smash, smash, smash go the bottles, until Dave finds the clue for Cool As Geek first.

At the field of ig-gnome-mity, the trailing two female Teams are now hunting for gnomes. While Dani is running around looking, Desiree just walks half-heartedly around and even digging holes to look for her gnome. When Dani finds the gnome and takes off with Danielle, Desiree apologizes to her mother for her inability to find the gnoma. Wanda points out not too unkindly that Desiree was walking slowly while hunting for the gnome compared to Dani who was running around. Desiree insists that all the gnomes were taken and she doesn't know where to look anymore. Tears stream down her face. She's cracked, this Team is done for. Wanda ends up having to calm Desiree down and she does a good job, actually, steering Desiree until Desiree eventually locates a gnome. Finally, they take off.

The FranBerries are fourth. I'm sure they have a story about how strong they are and how they are now "in" the game, but the thing is, they're lucky in this leg of the Race, case closed.

The MoJos are fed up with their bottle-breaking and hightail it to the dancing, causing Ray to predict that those two will be back. They won't - the MoJos dance pretty badly but the dancers are ridiculously lenient so the MoJos now hightail it to the Pit Stop. The Telcoms now abandon the bottles and head over to dance as well, tails between their legs. They too don't dance that correctly but what the heck, eh? Go, go, Telcoms, shoo!

Predictably, Cool As Geek come in fifth, pleased as punch to have risen from ninth to fifth place in this season, while the MoJos come in sixth and the Telcoms seventh.

The Pink Poodles reach the Bavaria Film studio and choose to dance. They actually dance the best of the Teams that took the Detour and they are just leaving when the Meninas Do Gilmore show up. Desiree dances like she's just risen from the grave as a zombie but everyone behind that Detour just wants to collect their checks and go home so she and Wanda get their clue too. Some suspense montage follow where the Pink Poodles nearly squander all their lead in asking for directions. They and the Meninas Do Gilmore reach the Siegestor separated by mere seconds and it's a race to avoid elimination. In the end, the Pink Poodles come in eighth.

The Meninas Do Gilmore are therefore eliminated, awww. Desiree must be thinking of more than literal things when she says that they have been lost "a lot" in this leg and the last four days have been "hell" on them. I can understand. The double leg thing can be a killer especially when Desiree is put in a spot where if she crumbles even a little - like she did in this episode - the whole Team falls apart. Still, she says that she's proud of Wanda and Wanda reciprocates by saying that she loves Desiree and is confident now that Desiree is an independent woman. They really do seem to mean that, which makes me seeing them go a little easier. I really like them and I wish that they last longer on the Race, but I can see why they can't. Sigh.

Before YouTube, recapping music videos is totally a thing and not a waste of time. Really..

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