Shattered Vows (1983)

Posted by Mrs Giggles on March 31, 2019 in 2 Oogies, Idiot Box Reviews, Series: The Hitchhiker

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Shattered Vows (1983)
Shattered Vows (1983)

Main cast: Bruce Greenwood (Jeff Boder), Alexandra Stewart (Jackie Winslow), Aleisa Shirley (Pamela Winslow), Tom Heaton (Peter DeVries), Anna Teghararian (Grandmother), and Page Fletcher (The Hitchhiker)
Director: Ivan Nagy

The Hitchhiker is one of the earlier anthology series on TV during the 1980s, and it doesn’t hold back in the sleaze department in its first ever episode, Shattered Vows. The gimmick here is that each episode starts with a dishy hitchhiker with pretty nice buns, encased in jeans, walking around a desert backdrop before narrating some stupid lines related to that episode. Page Fletcher has the most 1980s haircut ever, but it’s alright when the rest of him is fine. At least, until he opens his mouth and that’s when reality sinks in: sometimes beautiful people should be seen, not heard.

Oh my, Bruce Greenwood is hot in the 1980s. The first scene of his sees him water-skiing in short shorts, which soon comes off when he meets up with his fiancée, the older and certainly more wealthy Jackie Winslow. Mr Greenwood shows a nice amount of skin in this episode, and while his female costars bare their bosoms, he bares his rear end. It’s win-win all around for everybody.

What, the plot? Oh, right. Jeff Boder is an ambitious young man who manages to snag the attention of the wealthy widow Jackie. They are about to get married, but even before they walk down the aisle, he is already sleeping with Jackie’s stepdaughter Pamela. Pamela “jokes” that Jackie’s death would make them both wealthy, and when she makes plans to go back to her college abroad after the wedding of Jeff and Jackie, the besotted Jeff decides to kill his wife so that he can have both the money and Pamela.

You see, due to some unexplained woo-woo stuff, a figurine of a married couple used on the wedding cake turns out to be a voodoo doll-like magical thing: whatever happens to the figure happens to Jackie and Jeff. Hence, it’s easy to come up with a plan to kill Jackie using the figurine, but oops, we all know there is a twist to this kind of stories. Bad people always get their comeuppance…

Frankly, this is a so-so episode. The woo-woo stuff never gels properly with the rest of the story, feeling like some cheaply shoehorned thing as a result. Get rid of the woo-woo stuff, and this one would be a decent Silk Stalkings plot. However, at the risk of coming off like a pervert severely in need of a life, I must confess that I have a pretty nice time watching this thing. Watching being the operative word here, as Mr Greenwood sure is pretty. Sure, he’s still hot these days, but who knew he was just as hot when he was younger? Mm-hmm indeed.

So yes, watch this for the sleaze and gratuitous nudity, because there isn’t much of anything else here.

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