Main cast: Harry Anderson (Jim Korman), Cynthia Gibb (Lorelei Phelps), Colleen Camp (Mildred Korman), Austin Straus (Bob Grimes), Lance Davis (Ari Goldstein), Richard Schiff (Lester Middleton), and John Kassir (The Crypt Keeper)
Director: Rowdy Herrington
Well, talk about meta. Korman’s Kalamity puts the spotlight on Jim Korman, an artist who works on the Tales from the Crypt magazine, and he is currently being investigated by the police officer Lorelei Phelps. You see, poor Jim is a beleaguered man henpecked by his shrewish wife Mildred (who, in addition to mocking him for not having a “real job”, also heckles him endlessly about his inability to sire a child) and falling behind his schedule, and people start dying in weird and gruesome ways around him. In fact, Lorelei, whom Jim bumps into at a laundromat, witnesses a man who tries to assault her being attacked by a monster that resembles something Jim draws in a comic. She wonders whether there is a connection there. Are those experimental fertility pills Jim is taking, which he claims is altering his imagination, responsible for somehow turning his monstrous creations into reality?
How’s this for even more meta: scriptwriter Terry Black must be in his woman-are-bitches phase when he wrote the script, because this entire episode is nothing more than a thinly veiled wet dream of a guy who wants circumstances to help him be rid of his wife so that he can get it on with a new, hot girl. Jim is not sympathetic or likable: he hits on Lorelei pretty much immediately with clumsy innuendos – which only serves to make Mildred’s constant paranoia about his cheating seem not so unfounded after all. Both he and Lorelei have no discernible personality, and the two of them have very little agency here. The episode happens around them, with Jim not even knowing what is happening around him. As for Mildred, she is an over the top shrew, but Colleen Camp actually steals the show in that she seems to be the only one among the cast who is aware of how absurd the whole thing is.
So, basically, man draws stuff, stuff kills wife, so man is now free to shack up with new hot girl, the end. If only real life works just like this for men who want to switch girlfriends but are too afraid to break things off himself!
Loves boys that sparkle, unicorns, money, Lego, chocolates, tasty buffets, video game music, and fantastical stories.