Main cast: Diego Luna (Cassian Andor), Stellan Skarsgård (Luthen Rael), Genevieve O’Reilly (Mon Mothma), Denise Gough (Dedra Meero), Kyle Soller (Syril Karn), Adria Arjona (Bix Caleen), Kathryn Hunter (Eedy Karn), Muhannad Bhaier (Wilmon), Anton Lesser (Major Lio Partagaz), Robert Emms (Supervisor Lonni Jung), Jacob James Beswick (Supervisor Heert), Richard Sammel (Carro Rylanz), Thierry Godard (Lezine), and Forest Whitaker (Saw Gerrera)
Director: Ariel Kleiman
Ever Been to Ghorman? really confirms the vibe that Lucasfilm is sprinting toward the finish line of a contractual obligation like a kid trying to finish veggies to get dessert.
Dropping three more episodes at once? That’s not confidence. That’s a mercy killing.
Let’s unpack this masterpiece of beige intrigue and moping faces:
- Time skip alert! This episode takes place one year after the previous episode, so we’re now speeding toward the deaths of the main characters by the time Rogue One: A Star Wars Story comes around.
- Another year, another reminder that Andor’s face will remain frozen in that same “mildly constipated angst” expression whether it’s five minutes or five decades later. Why even do a prequel when everyone knows the story already? He and Bix are together again, but everyone that has watched Rogue One: A Star Wars Story will know how that one ends. If we don’t get a slo-mo “NOOOOOOO!” from him cradling Bix by episode 11, what are we even doing here?
- Syril Karn’s tragic incel arc continues apace. Now on Ghorman, he’s basically trying to catfish the Rebel Alliance to impress Dedra Meero, who radiates the romantic availability of a Cuisinart. Honestly, his whole storyline feels like a low budget Gone Girl, but with stormtroopers.
- The “spy vs spy vs spy vs spy” bit with Luthen Rael and the ISB is such Saturday morning cartoon stuff it’s adorable. “Aha! I know your plan!” “But wait —I knew you’d know my plan, so I had a counter-plan!” We’re one episode away from someone hiding a message in a loaf of bread.
- Andor and Bix’s mope-a-thon is a masterclass in how two characters with no chemistry can suck all the oxygen out of a scene by simply… touching hands. Was this meant to be tender? Profound? Moving? It felt like when you get stuck at a work party and someone accidentally brushes your elbow at the cheese table and you both pretend it didn’t happen.
- Mon Mothma cameo, mostly to remind us she exists. By season’s end she’ll have spent more time standing near windows and sipping space Chardonnay than actually doing anything revolutionary.
- Saw Gerrera cameo, because apparently even the writers forgot he was a non-presence in that movie. His sole purpose here is to stand dramatically in doorways and mutter about things like a rejected House of the Dragon character.
Overall verdict: finally, stuff happens. Slowly. It’s nice that some threads are moving toward somewhere—even if that somewhere is just Another Beige Corridor: The Series. But it’s also a show so caught up in its own supposed prestige that it’s the literary equivalent of someone trying to turn a pizza party into a dissertation on gluten ethics.
Four episodes in and the biggest mystery remains: how Diego Luna keeps getting work in the Star Wars franchise.
