The Passion
by Nicole Jordan, historical (2000)
Ivy, $6.99, ISBN 0-449-00485-6

Lady Aurora Demming decides to marry a condemned man, Nicholas Sabine, to escape an unpleasant suitor. She will provide for his half-sister while he will, of course, give her a taste of love and free her of an obnoxious suitor before he expires. How touching. Too bad Nicholas doesn't end up dead as planned, and now both of them have to deal with an unexpected marriage.

Welcome to Nicole Jordan's latest virgin ninny-rake pairing, The Passion.

Good things first: the hero. Nicholas Sabine is hot, hot, hot, and as a plus, he isn't one of those fake so-tortured-but-it's-all-my-evil-momma's-fault rakes. He wants Aurora, and he will get her. Yummy.

Now the bad thing: Aurora. I think there is nothing, absolutely nothing more irritating than a woman who subjects every love scene she is in with a shrill "Get out of my bed, get out of my life!" whining. It not only ruins whatever aftermath of a heavy-breathing love scene, it grates on my nerves the umpteenth time that happens. Is this woman lobotomized since birth? She doesn't find life too hard to endure when Nicky shows her how people have fun in bed, but she doesn't hesitate to drown me with her irritating Omigod, no more of this (until the next chapter, that is) - NO MORE! NO MORE! NO MORE! shrillfest.

Is she frigid? I think so. Even to the last page, she seems unaffected by pleasure or any emotion apart from a martyr-like resignation to the dirty words - responsibility, decorum, duty. Heck, remember, she has her first Orgasm for the sake of mankind (okay, to get rid of an unwanted suitor, but still, it's a Noble, Selfless Cause, people!). Now she has to Endure. Poor woman.

On behalf of all the members of the Society of Women who could Use More Orgasms In Their Life, I am really, really offended. A woman who manages to make eye-popping, mind-boggling, non-stop firecracker orgasm marathons more painful than a lobotomy doesn't deserve her jolly-wollies. Aurora, go back to the closet where you belong, you ninny!

Someone find Nicky a woman who could enjoy her sex life, will you?

Readers who like their romances hot and their heroine keeps protesting that she doesn't like it - not really, no way, no no no no! (i.e. we shouldn't enjoy it - sssh, don't tell the preacher please) - will have a great time with The Passion. Me, I think the Puritanical Society for Chastity Belts and Hair Suits have found an innovative way to use sex as a cautionary weapon. Sex hurts. Aurora hurts, really, Poisoned by Orgasms. Ouch. Ladies, you've been warned.

Rating: 70

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