Main cast: Mike Myers (Austin Danger Powers, Dr Evil, Fat Bastard, Goldmember), Beyoncé Knowles (Foxy Cleopatra), Michael York (Basil Exposition), Michael Caine (Captain Hendricks/Nigel Powers), Seth Green (Scott Evil), Robert Wagner (Number Two), Mindy Sterling (Frau Farbissina), and Verne Troyer (Mini-Me/Mini-Austin)
Director: Jay Roach
The best word to describe Austin Powers in Goldmember, the third instalment of the Austin Powers franchise, is “lazy”. I would have been more receptive to it if it’s an outright brainless movie all about body function jokes, but there is actually intelligence at work sometimes behind the scenes. More often than not, however, this movie is recycling its jokes from its predecessors, and it’s like dealing with a lazy student who could have been so much more if she tries a little harder.
The plot of this movie is something about Dr Evil kidnapping Austin’s father Nigel, and Austin has to save him as smash a series of villains from Goldmember to Dr Evil and… um, do you really care? Seriously?
There are some good moments – like the hilarious “Austin Powers” movie thing starring Tom Cruise as Austin and Gwyneth Paltrow as his floozy (Mr Cruise doesn’t need any false dentures to make his teeth look like Mike Myers’s false teeth, I’m happy to report – maybe he is hoping that sunlight will reflect off his overbite and act as a guide for his precious Xenu to land his ship, or something). Beyoncé Knowles surpass my expectations as blaxploitation sidekick Foxy Cleopatra – although that may be because she doesn’t have to do anything but to look gorgeous. It’s also amusing that this movie, while gagging on semen, penis, feces, and other delectable jokes, dares not show Austin and Foxy in any hanky-panky action. Apparently jokes about erections are okay, but a white man in bed with a black woman is a no-no.
If I look closely, some scenes are knowing tributes to movies acknowledged by critics in general as masterpieces, including a tribute to Apocalypse Now if I am paying close attention. Yes, someone’s at home upstairs. But for too long, this movie is content to put out mostly unfunny “Dutch and Japanese people are stupid!” jokes, midget jokes, penis jokes, toilet humor, and other tired and easy targets. It would be very easy to be offended, if this movie isn’t so half-baked that it seems as if everyone behind this movie is trying to grab as much buck as he or she can before the whole franchise crash and burn to the ground. Frankly, I’m more annoyed that I paid theater price for this movie than anything else. I’d suggest that anyone wanting to watch this one to wait for video or the HBO premiere.