Taylor Swift finally embraces pop in what is most likely her most calculated album ever.
He wants to cover every inch of my body with his autograph. I hope he dots every i carefully. Wait, did I say that out loud?
Another washed-up boyband trying to come back. Can’t blame them, but they could put more effort into it.
How cute, it’s LFO. Wait, these guys are called MKTO instead. Let’s hope they last longer than those fair-weather beach bums.
Backstreet Boys keep coming back, like geriatric uncles in stained boxer shorts trying to pull a Magic Mike before a crowd of bewildered teenage girls.
Parents may cringe when Ariana Grande sings about things like “Don’t let these eyes fool ya, I can take it. Hold nothing back – give it to me!” but I’m sure their kids would definitely approve. Bang bang into the room, baby!
Cher Lloyd shows marked improvement in her follow-up effort, but because the bar was set so low previously, this means a new and improved Cher Lloyd is about the same level as the Demis, Arianas, and other mini-skirted sweet tarts out there. Sirens is a fine song, though, worth a few listens.
Sia discovers a new generation of dreamy little girls who would ordain her as the spokesperson for their little earthquakes. Hey, with Kate Bush and Tori Amos getting a bit long in the tooth, may as well hand the job to Sia.
We have “street thug” Iggy Azalea and now we have “punk band” 5 Seconds of Summer. What is wrong with Australia and why are they doing this to the rest of the world?
Yes, it’s another release by a singing competition winner that is tanking in the charts. Come what may, though, Tessanne Chin can always take pride in the fact that she delivered a gorgeous adult contemporary album that hits all the right spots.
I’m not sure what happened, but while the previous album is fabulous, this one is a sleeping pill. The best song is a cover version – that’s how dreary the situation is.
Since when did Lana Del Rey’s daughter come up with an album? Wait, that’s not it? Anyway, this album is Lorde’s beautiful apology for Royals being played to death everywhere.
If Tori Amos and Suzanne Vega somehow have a child together, that child would make this album. Angry, sultry, moody, temperamental – Lana Del Rey sounds like she’d be someone amazing, once she grows up and stops writing those silly lyrics.
RuPaul may be born naked, but she’s also covered in cheese.
The songs could have been great, but it’s pretty obvious that Boy George can no longer sing like he used to. How unfortunate, really.
The mermaid polish-remover drag queen from Azusa just wants everyone to PARTY, PARTY, PARTY in this explicit collection of dance tunes. Surprisingly, things are more EDM than camp, and that’s good.
No, she’s not Amy Lee and they are not Evanescence. This could be a good or a bad thing, depending on how much teen angst you like in your music.
If you aren’t here to party, then you aren’t here for Avicii.